Need help showing up my wifes Ex. Its for the Children

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Cool off. I understand you got hurt, but no need to act selfish. Relax and do what is best for your son. The 50 idea was simply retarded. The concussion alone is enough to make a grown man uncomfortable. Never mind recoil, flash, etc. At first I honestly thought you were joking. The AR idea similarly foolish. Here is what happens when you push a kid too quick too soon.



Would you give your son AR on his second trip??? Of course not. So why are you talking about it now. He has at least 2-3 years of work with 22. Get him proficient with 22, both rifle and pistol, and then and only then bump him up. And if you are lucky and do your job as a father you might in 3-4 years get a son who can do this.



remember it is not about you… it is ALL about your son.
 
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As a step dad, who had to deal with a douche of a sperm donor for my daughter, my advice is going to be simple. You already won. You are going to have more day to day special little moments with him than the sperm donor ever will. You want to piss him off, don't let him know it bothered you, but spend more time with your son and make the relationship stronger. It's really not about you, or the dickbag, or any thing else beyond the kid.
 
I'm a father of three kids with my ex wife. She dumped me after 11yrs when she found out my buddy had lots of money and a big house. Court realized I was a good father and gave me 50% custody. I paid no child support or alimony. When the kids were with me for a week I'd pay for them, when they were with her, she'd pay for them. Of course they were spoiled by a guy who would buy them lots of things so they would get lost so he and my selfish ex would have more time to themselves. I didn't have a money tree and even if I did I would have stayed the course that I did being a father first and foremost. My kids have come to realize the jerk their mother can be and the jerk the guy was. (yes, he died at 50yrs!) Sorry, can't say I was broke up.
With the whole experience I learned to document everything I did with the kids and everything the ex with Mr. Wonderful did with the kids. I never tried to compete with them and always did the right thing. You need to do the same. Don't "buy" your stepson's affection or respect, earn it being a good dad. Don't diss his POS biological father as they don't want to hear it. Sometimes it's hard but keep in in the back of your mind not to do it. My kids are now a lot older. My son, the youngest, (23) keeps telling me time and time again how much he realizes how his mom and his deceased step dad tried to buy him and how it worked for a while. My oldest daughter says and knows the same yet has some issues of her own she needs to work out. My middle daughter choose not to have a relationship with me since she was 14 because her mom "bought" her affection by giving her everything she wanted including letting her go out with 20+yr old guys when she was just 14! My son now tells me his sister has started showing regrets that we don't have a relationship and acknowledges that it is her who is to blame. There is hope that she will come around but she has grown to be even more selfish than her mom.
The one thing I can say is I acted honorably like a dad and role model should all through the years. I can hold my head high and know I never stooped to kids games or revenge to make myself feel better. Just continue to take your stepson shooting and progress up with the weapons like your normally would. His day of shooting his first cartridge gun has passed. He will have many more firsts with you and they should be "normal" firsts.
Remember, if you do have a family day with the wife's ex make sure you take lots of pictures. If it ever comes up in court for any reason you have proof that he agreed to do it with you.
 
Business said:
i would love to get him a golden boy but his first gun shouldn't be a $400+ lever action. a simple bolt gun that he can practice going through the motions will do just fine i just never see em in stores. Any body have something second hand they don't need? perhaps I should post a WTB thread
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Dick's in Natick has all kinds of bolt .22's if you will buy there.

Getting Evan to be able to handle firearms at all is a big win already, even if you weren't there. The anti Dad lost.

Add in his fiance wanting to learn to shoot is a bigger loss.

If it were me, I would pick up the bolt gun, and then plan a range trip for the entire blended family. Offer (in advance) to let the Bio father 'share' in the purchase, so it is from both of you as a gift to the boy. Let the fiance shoot too. It's killing them with kindness, being the better man AND sticking it to his anti-views - when his son and fiance would rather go to the range than listen to moonbattery. If your stepson ends up with a bolt gun that is 'his', and the bio father participated, there leaves little room for him to complain to DSS or any court when you presented the gun to him together. If the bio father insists HE be the one who buys it.....does it really matter? Deploy the liberal tactic of incrementalism and he will be shooting a Mosin before his 12th birthday.
 
Business said:
So I guess because I kind of want to stick it to his father, and give my stepson a great memory, does anybody have a barrett .50 in the general area of North Attleboro that wouldn't mind letting my son take a couple shots off of? I will pay for the ammo his mother is on the same page with me, we both think its the best way to beat a .22 and give him a great story to tell when he goes back to school.

thanks in advance- Bizz
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We aren't near North Attleboro, but if you can venture north to the Londonderry, NH area, we can make a 82A1 in .50 BMG, a 99 in .416 Barrett, and/or a proper full-auto Ma Deuce available (completely controllable for him, locked into it's tripod). PM me. [smile]
 
This is like dueling car salesman shit. Are you twelve?

-Proud to be dad every day, a licensed plumber most days, and wish I was a shoemaker on others.
 
Acme.Armament said:
We aren't near North Attleboro, but if you can venture north to the Londonderry, NH area, we can make a 82A1 in .50 BMG, a 99 in .416 Barrett, and/or a proper full-auto Ma Deuce available (completely controllable for him, locked into it's tripod). PM me. [smile]
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How much for me :)


Best advice I can give having a shitty step dad and a shitty real dad . Be there for the kid but don't try to one up the other one . The kid mite see it as your doing it to show off not for him , if that makes any sense .
 
Chistech said:
I'm a father of three kids with my ex wife. She dumped me after 11yrs when she found out my buddy had lots of money and a big house. Court realized I was a good father and gave me 50% custody. I paid no child support or alimony. When the kids were with me for a week I'd pay for them, when they were with her, she'd pay for them. Of course they were spoiled by a guy who would buy them lots of things so they would get lost so he and my selfish ex would have more time to themselves. I didn't have a money tree and even if I did I would have stayed the course that I did being a father first and foremost. My kids have come to realize the jerk their mother can be and the jerk the guy was. (yes, he died at 50yrs!) Sorry, can't say I was broke up.
With the whole experience I learned to document everything I did with the kids and everything the ex with Mr. Wonderful did with the kids. I never tried to compete with them and always did the right thing. You need to do the same. Don't "buy" your stepson's affection or respect, earn it being a good dad. Don't diss his POS biological father as they don't want to hear it. Sometimes it's hard but keep in in the back of your mind not to do it. My kids are now a lot older. My son, the youngest, (23) keeps telling me time and time again how much he realizes how his mom and his deceased step dad tried to buy him and how it worked for a while. My oldest daughter says and knows the same yet has some issues of her own she needs to work out. My middle daughter choose not to have a relationship with me since she was 14 because her mom "bought" her affection by giving her everything she wanted including letting her go out with 20+yr old guys when she was just 14! My son now tells me his sister has started showing regrets that we don't have a relationship and acknowledges that it is her who is to blame. There is hope that she will come around but she has grown to be even more selfish than her mom.
The one thing I can say is I acted honorably like a dad and role model should all through the years. I can hold my head high and know I never stooped to kids games or revenge to make myself feel better. Just continue to take your stepson shooting and progress up with the weapons like your normally would. His day of shooting his first cartridge gun has passed. He will have many more firsts with you and they should be "normal" firsts.
Remember, if you do have a family day with the wife's ex make sure you take lots of pictures. If it ever comes up in court for any reason you have proof that he agreed to do it with you.
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that was well put, as was lot of great advice on here...just keeping being a great step dad to him
 
my wifes ex liked to start in ,and it isn't cool to take the bait.

but one time i couldn't resist.

He came over once to pick up the kid when we were ready to go out to a wedding

and made the crack "so how are you liking getting all that used kitty"?

I said"well once I get past the used part its all good bro"[party]
 
Business said:
I envisioned a blanket rolled up to pad between his shoulder and the but of the rifle. esentially trying to lock down the gun and have him basically be a trigger puller not much aiming involved just for the experience

And to all you guys saying let it go I hear ya and any other day i would be with you but this guy is a douch, yes he is his Biological dad but anybody who knows me knows i am far more of a father then he. This was our thing and i'd be willing to bet his dad knew in the back of his mind this would erk me. its just how he is.
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If you think his dad did it to irk you, then trying to one up him is going to give him the satisfaction that it worked. Personally, I would use reverse psychology and thank his dad, and then follow up with your plans for a family shoot at the range.
 
Don't sweat the kid's father. Just go about your business of building a solid relationship with your step son. Resist the urge to rush him into the next biggest gun. Take the high road, teach the boy right, carry on as before and don't worry about what he does with his dad. You will all be better off for it.

Good luck and enjoy.
 
You have the approach all wrong. Keep shooting with his kid.

Teach his wife to shoot.
Go with her to the class and get her to join the same range as you.
The rest writes itself.

Dont screw with the kid. Focus and screw with him where it hurts most. Lets face it you are already screwing one of the women he loves.


 
The only thing that should matter (outside of personal emotions) is ... making sure the kid is happy and being brought up well. Honestly it sounds like this child is well loved and well cared for. You should be proud of the job your doing and know in your mind that the boy loves you back. That is all that matters... oh and that he is a half decent shot hahah
 
Chistech said:
I'm a father of three kids with my ex wife. She dumped me after 11yrs when she found out my buddy had lots of money and a big house. Court realized I was a good father and gave me 50% custody. I paid no child support or alimony. When the kids were with me for a week I'd pay for them, when they were with her, she'd pay for them. Of course they were spoiled by a guy who would buy them lots of things so they would get lost so he and my selfish ex would have more time to themselves. I didn't have a money tree and even if I did I would have stayed the course that I did being a father first and foremost. My kids have come to realize the jerk their mother can be and the jerk the guy was. (yes, he died at 50yrs!) Sorry, can't say I was broke up.
With the whole experience I learned to document everything I did with the kids and everything the ex with Mr. Wonderful did with the kids. I never tried to compete with them and always did the right thing. You need to do the same. Don't "buy" your stepson's affection or respect, earn it being a good dad. Don't diss his POS biological father as they don't want to hear it. Sometimes it's hard but keep in in the back of your mind not to do it. My kids are now a lot older. My son, the youngest, (23) keeps telling me time and time again how much he realizes how his mom and his deceased step dad tried to buy him and how it worked for a while. My oldest daughter says and knows the same yet has some issues of her own she needs to work out. My middle daughter choose not to have a relationship with me since she was 14 because her mom "bought" her affection by giving her everything she wanted including letting her go out with 20+yr old guys when she was just 14! My son now tells me his sister has started showing regrets that we don't have a relationship and acknowledges that it is her who is to blame. There is hope that she will come around but she has grown to be even more selfish than her mom.
The one thing I can say is I acted honorably like a dad and role model should all through the years. I can hold my head high and know I never stooped to kids games or revenge to make myself feel better. Just continue to take your stepson shooting and progress up with the weapons like your normally would. His day of shooting his first cartridge gun has passed. He will have many more firsts with you and they should be "normal" firsts.
Remember, if you do have a family day with the wife's ex make sure you take lots of pictures. If it ever comes up in court for any reason you have proof that he agreed to do it with you.
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awesome post.
went thru the same shit with the wife's ex and the kids, they're early 20's now and realized the wife and I took the high road. They don't even talk to their father anymore. Be yourself, enjoy your stepson while he's growing up, advise him along the path to maturity and he'll be fine.
As for my wife's ex? I thank him everyday for giving me the hot trophy wife I have! [smile]
 
fencer said:
Nope, your next move should be to bang his fiance. Then you win... for life.
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I don't know if I'd bang her literally, that might effect your relationship with your current wife. I'd break her shooting Hyman with the help of your wife, behind his back of course. That way you'll be able to sleep better knowing there's an Alpha parent to protect your step son when he's staying with them.

When my step daughter was 6, I married her Mother. She'll be 29 this fall. She says that her Father is her Father, but I'll always be her Dad.

Her Father was a Swat Cop in Kingston, Jamaica back in the early 80's, so technically he was the first gun guy in our collective. When he was dating my wife, she'd make him drive way out in the boonies and pop the trunk, so she could fire his M-16. She'd be the second gun nut, followed by my step daughter. They had their LTC's before me. It's not like I didn't shoot as a kid, but having a DWI, I had resigned myself to the fact I'd never be able to get an LTC. Little did I know, that having a Pre-Ban DWI aka before 1994, it would have no effect on obtaining an LTC [grin]
 
Chistech said:
I'm a father of three kids with my ex wife. She dumped me after 11yrs when she found out my buddy had lots of money and a big house. Court realized I was a good father and gave me 50% custody. I paid no child support or alimony. When the kids were with me for a week I'd pay for them, when they were with her, she'd pay for them. Of course they were spoiled by a guy who would buy them lots of things so they would get lost so he and my selfish ex would have more time to themselves. I didn't have a money tree and even if I did I would have stayed the course that I did being a father first and foremost. My kids have come to realize the jerk their mother can be and the jerk the guy was. (yes, he died at 50yrs!) Sorry, can't say I was broke up.
With the whole experience I learned to document everything I did with the kids and everything the ex with Mr. Wonderful did with the kids. I never tried to compete with them and always did the right thing. You need to do the same. Don't "buy" your stepson's affection or respect, earn it being a good dad. Don't diss his POS biological father as they don't want to hear it. Sometimes it's hard but keep in in the back of your mind not to do it. My kids are now a lot older. My son, the youngest, (23) keeps telling me time and time again how much he realizes how his mom and his deceased step dad tried to buy him and how it worked for a while. My oldest daughter says and knows the same yet has some issues of her own she needs to work out. My middle daughter choose not to have a relationship with me since she was 14 because her mom "bought" her affection by giving her everything she wanted including letting her go out with 20+yr old guys when she was just 14! My son now tells me his sister has started showing regrets that we don't have a relationship and acknowledges that it is her who is to blame. There is hope that she will come around but she has grown to be even more selfish than her mom.
The one thing I can say is I acted honorably like a dad and role model should all through the years. I can hold my head high and know I never stooped to kids games or revenge to make myself feel better. Just continue to take your stepson shooting and progress up with the weapons like your normally would. His day of shooting his first cartridge gun has passed. He will have many more firsts with you and they should be "normal" firsts.
Remember, if you do have a family day with the wife's ex make sure you take lots of pictures. If it ever comes up in court for any reason you have proof that he agreed to do it with you.
Click to expand...
Exes, kids and firearms are a scary combination, especially if the situation becomes really volatile and ends up in court. One 209A, issued at the request of an irrational ex, is all it takes. Goodbye guns, ammo, LTC, FID and kids! Tread very lightly here!
 
transamkid86 said:
Why dont you buy him his 1st 22 like the little rascal i think its called that
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That was going to be MY suggestion, too.

Buy him a Cricket or other single-shot .22. Sure his dad let him shoot someone else's .22, but having his OWN puts you on another level. He'll forget all about the 'first' .22 he shot when he's got the first he's ever owned, instead.

(BTW, my sig line below relates to my dealings with MY ex-wife.)
 
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Let him shoot an AR15 or an AK47 much easier to shoot than a barret. And if he is in to video games he will enjoy it even more. From experience getting into a pissing match with your wifes ex never ends well. Just be there for your step son and treat him as if he is your own, you may not think it but kids notice little things and if the ex is as much as a dousche bag as you say your step son will see it. I don't know if you ever fired a .50 cal but the concussion alone feels like a punch in the face hardly apropiate for a 10 y.o.
 
Ya Idk about the barret being a good idea, if the father gets mad about it, its not going to be easy to explain why you went out of your way so his son could shoot it

Now if you can find someone with a ma deuce you would be in luck, because now you can say, it was a once in a lifetime chance to soot it,
you can't say no to that [devil2][devil2]

Ya in going to hell
 
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i'll offer up an AK or an AR, got a drum for the AK.

i enjoy instigating conflict, will probably hit the range this weekend, but it'll be in lunenburg if i go.
 
I sh!t you not, I want to call my son now and see how he is doing...

Once they are 18+ they never seem to want to hang with Dad anymore.
 
HKdrummer said:
Everyone is missing the entire point here, Evan has the potential to win bigtime. Two dads, no not that way, that like guns! Kid will be a expert marksmen getting more range time than most adults [laugh]
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this.

Maybe even reach out to the Dad and say hey I'd like to go in with you on getting the son a target 22 rifle... "If he keeps it up maybe he can shoot in the Olympics or something like that..."
 
Why compete? Why not be amicable and give the child a real advantage growing up? Two families working together will produce a better result than two families always at odds over the children.

Children are not trophies to compete over or win.

I'm on the opposite side of a situation where bio mom does everything to promote step dad as the only dad. It sucks. There are things I want to do with my son that mom wants him to do with step dad. Shoot, drive a car, play basketball, etc.

I bet if I told her I wanted to teach our son to drive next weekend, she would have her hubby do it this weekend and then brag about how he's the best dad in the world for doing so.


I could tell you some stories... Sadly









Sent from my iPhone 4S using Tapatalk
 
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