Ladies, help me in breaking the news to the Wife ...

[Radtekk]

Lady Radtekk said: "Sucks to be him. Better off telling her the truth from the start and dealing with it."

She carries a Glock 26, shoots my GP100 and 12ga pump like a boss, and notices when I DON'T have my 1911 on my hip (when we're watching TV it's on the coffee table unless I switch to a shoulder rig).

So I'd tell her how you feel, why you want to carry, and let the chips fall where they may. You've got the guns, wtf does she think you're gonna do with them? And start with "I love you..."

 

[92G]

When I carry it is a S&W 642, either in my front pocket or IWB. She has never noticed.
Concealed means concealed... To everyone.
I had a discussion early on with the wife. I told her it was my responsibility for her safety and that I could never forgive myself if something happened to her/me and I had the means to protect us sitting at home in a safe.

^^this
the only reason for anyone to know you are carrying is if you carry the same magazines and are willing to share....but it sounds like your wife ain't carrying any mags.

 

[jasons]

This sort if thread never ends well here.

 

[Stevireno]

I disagree with carrying and not telling her. Wife should know. I told me wife and kids to assume I am always carrying, if they come in for a hug and I divert their hands, they always know why. My wife does not like me carrying at all. I constantly hammered in ."Its for the safety of this family".. I made it about me wanting to protect her and my family if something bad happened. She slowly got it. I carried more and more, she heard the safe go "click" in the bedroom and knew that I was getting my gun. At first she would protest, then she tolerated it, now she accepts it. Still doesn't like it, but she accepts it. Your in a tough spot, but I would push the whole "This is so I can protect my family". Read her articles in the news of people being assaulted in MA, show her that it does happen. Be calm, try not to yell back, it might get through to her. My wifes politics took a 180 once I started showing her how messed up Libtards are....

-Steve

 

[rickinma]

I personally wouldn't bother with an empty holster or carrying in the home - she will disagree with it and you won't have a good reason.
The first time my wife knew I carried it was because I was selling a car and would be walking around with 5k in cash and didn't know the buyer - why wouldn't she want me to be prepared for anything? Similarly, on that day the Mayan calendar ended or Sept 11th or full moon or needing to visit a rough neighborhood -why wouldn't she want me to be able to defend my family?
Then, since that is without incident, it's easier to expand.
My point - fear is likely causing her to dislike guns - use it to condition her to accept it.
Or, follow the don't take advice" advice

 

[mremski]

This sort if thread never ends well here.

True, but's they are fun while they last.

 

[Rockrivr1]

I disagree with carrying and not telling her. Wife should know. I told me wife and kids to assume I am always carrying, if they come in for a hug and I divert their hands, they always know why.

Until she outs him during a bank robbery by saying "why don't you shoot them with your concealed handgun"! If you survive that it's time for the divorce!!!

This isn't just a question of you conceal carrying. This is a question on whether you are happy or not at all. To me it sounds like you are not. So the question really should be why are you still married? Life is too short to be miserable. She chose the new state, the new house and the timetable it sounds like. How much input did you have? Any? If not, is there any up side to you still being in that relationship other then her good money? Unless the sex is mind blowing it's time to seek happiness somewhere else. Been there, done that. Don't waste to many more years trying to figure it out.

 

[Varmint]

Wait until the move is done and the stress level is back to normal before saying anything. Tossing this into the mix right away would be a mistake.

Great advice here.

 

[browncoat]

As someone previously said - why are you starting to carry now when you never bothered to before? It's not like NC and RI are way safer than MA. Marriage is a partnership, and partnerships involve compromise. Luckily for me, my wife, although she doesn't love shooting or guns, is happy that I'm happy.

 

[Mountain]

I'm a somewhat recent transplant to the PRM, FWIW...

You will need the LTC-A just to exercise many of the same rights as you had in states that don't subvert the constitution, even if your intention isn't to concealed carry. CC'ing was one of those things I planned to get done eventually but put it off because I could take handguns, AR's, etc. to and from the range, in some places even keep loaded in my vehicle for self defense, could buy ammo, and had no worries for home defense without any form of 'papers'. Moving to MA forced me to step up and get my LTC right away. As a side benefit, I almost always carry unless going to work or some other obvious no-go. Whether or when you carry is up to you, but you simply must get your LTC to even exercise some of the most basic firearms rights once you cross Checkpoint Charlie. Bare minimum you'll need an FID, but why bother since this only allows you to use your previously purchased handguns as a paperweight in your safe.

Moving is VERY stressful. Good luck.

 

[xero2099]

Buy her something sparkly to wear that matches your EDC rig. Use it as a diversion.

For the win!

 

[Buggin]

seriously though if you've been married for 20 years the last place you want to get relationship advice is NES.

Best advice I've seen on NES. Ironic, no?

 

[Quiet]

As someone previously said - why are you starting to carry now when you never bothered to before? It's not like NC and RI are way safer than MA. Marriage is a partnership, and partnerships involve compromise. Luckily for me, my wife, although she doesn't love shooting or guns, is happy that I'm happy.

Ludlow is a scary town.
Nestled next to Springfield and Chicopee to the west and Wilbraham (home of Friendly's) to the south, it is often referred to as the gateway to Belchertown.

 

[browncoat]

Ludlow is a scary town.
Nestled next to Springfield and Chicopee to the west and Wilbraham (home of Friendly's) to the south, it is often referred to as the gateway to Belchertown.

Friendly's? I didn't know. Gotta be open carrying a 12 gauge before I feel safe in one of those hellholes.

 

[mikeyp]

You need to tell her that she needs to get her license as well, take the training and make the application for her license.

She needs to be able to take control of (and responsibility for) the guns in the house when you're not home. Or if they're in your car. She should be able to handle them safely. Take her to a very nice and clean range for the training, such as Mass Firearms School.

Not only this, but point out the stupidity of our laws here. The OP may not know it, but if his wife takes his car and he dropped an evil extra-killy boolit on the floor and she gets pulled over by a cop, she's screwed.

 

[lasitter]

What have you been doing up till now? If you have never carried before, what made you decide to start?

I've been hold up in my man cave, not worrying about my gun rights because I didn't have to. In effect she brought up the subject by forcing the move.

When I noticed that the LTC-A was the new standard, and that I could easily satisfy all the requirements, I said "why not?"

She's going to be working at Baystate Medical Center, and less than two miles to the southeast is a part of town which has seen six murders so far this year. A little farther and you've got another six murders. If I head in her work direction some day and take a wrong turn into that kill zone, I definitely want to be wearing more than a smile.

Think about it, because I am sure Why now? will be her first question, well maybe second, I don't know her well enough to know if she will ask if you are nuts first.

She'll absolutely say that. She already says stupid stuff like: "Why don't you just get rid of your guns? You're not using them!"

The gun grabbers don't want to understand that I use my firearms every day without ever touching them. My guns protect me from them, and from governments at every level that want to trample our freedoms.

 

[jct61765]

Wait until the move is done and the stress level is back to normal before saying anything. Tossing this into the mix right away would be a mistake.

No it wouldn't.

 

[lasitter]

It's tricky when us women make up our mind about something and then get very stubborn. Easing into it, it the best way IMO.

Great actually hearing from a lady on this. Love your profile pix, BTW.

 

[lasitter]

If you want to continue being a "kept man", you'll have to pay the price.

Ahh, but which price?

 

[lasitter]

Her house; her rules--and there will be new ones. Given your trepidation, it sounds as if a gun-owning partner is not what she signed up for. Might as well sell the firearms now.

My gun rights are just as important to me as her abortion rights ever were to her. She might walk past 100+ people per day that are carrying. We've been best friends for 20 years. If this really is the straw that breaks the camel's back, she can give me my half of the house and I'll go back to North Carolina, where I have blood relatives that concealed carry and think nothing of it.

 

[lasitter]

My wife isn't "anti", but like others, aren't really into it either. She is a teacher. After some schools "lockdown" in the past few months the idea of guns in school came up. I told here I believed that teachers, who are licensed should be able to carry guns in school. We entrust them with the lives of our children on a daily basis, they should be capable of defending those children's lives. She thought about that and somewhat agreed, but disagreed with being capable of carrying in the classroom because of all of the interaction she has with the kids.

It's off topic of this thread, but since you mentioned it, I've been thinking about a potential school / student protection solution I'd like to try out on you.

I understand the fear that any weapon a teacher is carrying might be taken away in an unguarded moment and used for evil intent.

So I was thinking: What if you had a gun safe (combination push button) in every classroom, with of course the combination changed regularly only known to the teachers. In the event of gunfire / a lockdown, any teacher would have the option of accessing their defensive weapon, or not, as their conscience allowed. They could even decline to learn the combination codes if they wished.

The guns would be secured but available in an emergency, and no one would have to "carry" anything.

I always thought that something like this would satisfy many concerns about having a limited number of guns in a school "just in case" ...

 

[iofneedle]

Off topic maybe...is she hot?

 

[lasitter]

This isn't just a question of you conceal carrying. This is a question on whether you are happy or not at all. To me it sounds like you are not. So the question really should be why are you still married? Life is too short to be miserable. She chose the new state, the new house and the timetable it sounds like. How much input did you have? Any? If not, is there any up side to you still being in that relationship other then her good money? Unless the sex is mind blowing it's time to seek happiness somewhere else. Been there, done that. Don't waste to many more years trying to figure it out.

I admit that I'm old fashioned. I want to live and die married to one woman, just like my daddy did.

I try to ignore all the mass media messages that attempt to persuade us of what it is to be happy. I don't mind working at a relationship. I don't even mind much being the 2nd banana in a marriage. But it would be nice to be on the receiving end of some gratitude in terms of what I gave up back home in North Carolina so she could have her big important doctor career in Rhode Island and Massachusetts.

I'll be in PRMA in early December, so it's all over but the crying now!

 

[PATRON]

I would tell you to grow a pair,but after 20 years I think it's to late for you, buy a whistle.

 

[goodzilla]

She knows that I have to get the training and the LTC-A just to have the 15-round Ruger P85 which I purchased in 1989 back in North Carolina.

I've read the thread, and after careful consideration, I'm going to go with the a combination of concealed means concealed, followed by confusion, surprise, and befuddlement on discovery. When she discovers you're carrying, act surprised and say, "we discussed this, I got an L-T-C, License-To-Carry. What's the problem, I've been doing it for X [weeks...months...years if you're good]." Maybe slide in a sly "your safety means everything to me baby, you're my world". Then show her the tattoo that you got with her name. This is a long term strategy.

 

[seraxmd]

Wait until she finds out how doctors make sh*t in RI and most patients only come in for drugs or disability forms.

Oh, and this:

 

[GaryO]

Tell her Obama won't be POTUS forever and who will protect us when his benevolence leaves office.

 

[iofneedle]

I admit that I'm old fashioned. I want to live and die married to one woman, just like my daddy did.

I try to ignore all the mass media messages that attempt to persuade us of what it is to be happy. I don't mind working at a relationship. I don't even mind much being the 2nd banana in a marriage. But it would be nice to be on the receiving end of some gratitude in terms of what I gave up back home in North Carolina so she could have her big important doctor career in Rhode Island and Massachusetts.

I'll be in PRMA in early December, so it's all over but the crying now!

I am sure she is grateful for what you are giving up...but I assume you are moving because you are a loving and supportive husband. You don't think she appreciates you? If that is where your mind is going...you have bigger problems then CC in MA. I went down that road with my ex-wife...

 

[Mbian1122]

I am in the same boat as most. Wife thinks I am a little nutz and rolls her eyes when she notices I am carrying. Ironically she was the one who paid for my nra safety class to even start the ball rolling.

When she first realized I carried u just asked her if she trusted me and knows I will be responsible. Her answers where yes so why not carry.

 

[lasitter]

I've read the thread, and after careful consideration, I'm going to go with the a combination of concealed means concealed, followed by confusion, surprise, and befuddlement on discovery. When she discovers you're carrying, act surprised and say, "we discussed this, I got an L-T-C, License-To-Carry. What's the problem, I've been doing it for X [weeks...months...years if you're good]." Maybe slide in a sly "your safety means everything to me baby, you're my world". Then show her the tattoo that you got with her name. This is a long term strategy.

It'll be my first tattoo. I'm loving the strategy ...