Yup. That's why I made the suggestion.Women tend to listen better to anyone else but the SO.![[grin]](/xen/styles/default/xenforo/smilies.vb/041.gif "Grin [grin]")
That worries me more than anything else in this story.
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Advice Needed.....
- Thread starter 97serpent
- Start date
Marry someone who isn't the spawn of two obama-voting anti-civil rights lunatics.
And to the lady's parents: What kind of parents would raise a child and not be responsible enough to have the means of defending the household?
And to the lady's parents: What kind of parents would raise a child and not be responsible enough to have the means of defending the household?
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Ted Nugent said it best when he said something along the lines of:
"The way a person feels about another person's simplest right to defend their life, tells me all I need to know about the kind of individual that they are."
Find out how your fiancee really feels, not just what her moonbat father is stuffing in her ear, and then apply the above logic.
Yeah, that is a recipe for disaster before their marriage already gets off the ground. Not cool.
lowbuckbob
NES Member
You are a total package. That includes your guns and your philosophy to own them. If your fiancee has a problem with that, then she has a problem with you as a whole person. You should seriously talk with her and her parents about this. This could get much worse once you are married.
Were did he say that his bride to be is running off whining to daddy?... are we just making this stuff up.
How about that part right there where her DAD said they need to get together and talk about it.
Now tell me that isn't running to her parents.
![[thinking]](/xen/styles/default/xenforo/smilies.vb/010.gif "Thinking [thinking]")
How about reading comprehension?
How about that part right there where her DAD said they need to get together and talk about it.
Now tell me that isn't running to her parents.
How about reading comprehension?
Yes how about reading comprehension..
He showed the dad the guns... the dad said everyone needed to talk.... seems pretty cut and dry to me
Okay my bad, but it should still be a non issue. Shouldn't involve them.
Absolutely true - they may be welcome to express their opinions in a polite respectful manner but this is not a joint decision between the 4 of you.
If your core values are the same and you treat each other with respect, courtesy and honesty you've got a great start. If you respect each other's differences and are not undermining each other there's no reason this should be an issue.
If she can't stand up to her parents that's her problem and you don't need to enable her codependency. If the codependency means there are more than 2 people in your relationship that's a completely different situation and hold the wedding plans until it's resolved in a way both of you can live with.
Good luck.
Looks like most of the basic relationship stuff has been covered, so I'll just add two arguing points that have worked for me when family members have attacked me for owning firearms. On one occasion, my brother started in on me by insisting that "first...", I had to put trigger locks on my guns. I responded by telling him that I don't need trigger locks, they're crap, many are easily defeated, and don't prevent a round from being chambered. When he was about to open his mouth again, I continued to explain that is why I use action locks when the guns are stored. He realizes he's beyond his depth and off the mark as far as his assumptions about my regard for safety, end of conversation.
That was a lucky break, but almost without fail, I've been able to let someone get wound up about the guns, what if the kid ever got hold of them etc. I let it go with some flipant remarks about how they're locked up and it's no big deal, then when their energy level jumps up a notch, I lay into them with the fact that it's not the guns I'm worried about, it's the ammo! I could give my kid my shotgun and a pipe clamp, and she'd be at equal risk of getting an injury from either, but the ammo, the ammo is what I'm worried about! Again, realization they don't know what they're talking about, conversation over, doesn't tend to come back up.
That was a lucky break, but almost without fail, I've been able to let someone get wound up about the guns, what if the kid ever got hold of them etc. I let it go with some flipant remarks about how they're locked up and it's no big deal, then when their energy level jumps up a notch, I lay into them with the fact that it's not the guns I'm worried about, it's the ammo! I could give my kid my shotgun and a pipe clamp, and she'd be at equal risk of getting an injury from either, but the ammo, the ammo is what I'm worried about! Again, realization they don't know what they're talking about, conversation over, doesn't tend to come back up.
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It's like this... "I don't expect to change you, you were who you are before we met and that's that. I was who I am before we met and that's that. If you want me to change, then we won't work out, and it's you and me, OUR life. If your parents think they have a say in OUR life, and MY life, then it won't work. We can fool ourselves into thinking it will, but if we're not happy with the way the other is now, then it will only get worse as time goes on, not better". Um, I've been here before, not on guns, but in the same boat none the less. This is life. Get past this or don't go any further. And make sure the whole "inlaws thing is understood loud and clear. Don't be rude, but put your foot down. It has nothing to do with them. We didn't even do what they wanted at the wedding they helped pay for, as it was OUR wedding, we did it our way. Mark.
If her parents are going to have as substantial a role in your relationship after you're married as they do now, you'll have a problem. That's a matter for your fiance to resolve now. The rest of it is between you and her. And that's a much more manageable situation.
If it were I, and it's not, I'd ask her Mommy and Daddy straight up: "And your interest in this matter is ... what, exactly?"
If it were I, and it's not, I'd ask her Mommy and Daddy straight up: "And your interest in this matter is ... what, exactly?"
I think everything will be OK. I talked to my future father in law about something unrelated, and this topic came up. He said that he personally wouldn't like guns in his house, but he is in no way asking me to get rid of mine. He had no idea that I was into this stuff and was just surprised. It was an over reaction(the sit down meeting) at the time...he even said he would come shoot with me one of these days.
11 pages and this is the end result. WTF. no fight, no break up, no crying GF... Atleast go back and kick your father inlaw in the beanbags... All this poor advice and nothing to show for it. The drama queens on the board will not be happy
Stand your ground on this. Don't let others exert control over you.
Maybe you should go green and bring her to a shoot. She will meet a lot of great, kind, generous, down to earth people and maybe me.
![[smile]](/xen/styles/default/xenforo/smilies.vb/001.gif "Smile [smile]")
I'll try to avoid you both for your sake.
![[wink]](/xen/styles/default/xenforo/smilies.vb/002.gif "Wink [wink]")
Once She meets all the great people here, and shoots some EBR's chances are she'll turn around.
Once again, I plomiss
to keep my distance.Muhuwaha...
Please don't leave gun porn out to convert a gun shy person, especially a woman. It took me a lot longer to come around to those magazines than it did to the guns.
Take the newbies to the range with some fun guns, and encourage them to try them all. "No, that's too big, I can't shoot that... <bang, bang, bang> hee hee <bang, bang> ... Can I do it again?"
I just found out I helped to convert a friend's mom. She was freaked out that I was carrying, we talked about why I carry, how I came to that decision, and why that's the right decision for me. We also talked about the insanity of a lot of the new gun laws proposed. I really didn't expect a convert, just to spread the seeds of knowledge. Lo and behold, I get a phone call Sunday asking where I got the gun she saw.
namedpipes
NES Member
It's OK, really! We needed a human sacrifice for the Pumpkin shoot this fall. 'Serp can take that role!
interesting. my wife is/was the opposite. she never minded the gun porn, and actually liked cool looking PICTURES of guns, she was/is scared of the real thing. But maybe she's an odd duck because she loves hockey fights on TV and UFC pay-per-view, but wilts if anyone in the "real world" raises their voice.
