Dumb wannabe gun owners say

Wrench75 said:
LOL For your sake I hope not. He is short and stocky and from either PR or DR I think. It was amazing the lengths he would go to one up someone. If you told him you caught a 30 lb striper while out on your friend's boat. He would tell you about the time he caught a marlin while fishing off the shore. Seriously.

You almost have to wonder if these people are so delusional that they actually believe the shit they say. You would think that, after a conversation like the one in my last post, he would have just never spoken to me again. Nope.

The next day it was like it never happened. Like he went home and just rewrote the entire encounter in his mind so that it all worked out for him. No small part of the reason I lit him up was because I was sick of hearing his shit 12 hrs a day. I figured it would get my point across and he would just go bother other people. It did not have the desired effect... [sad]
Click to expand...
Just a quickie of our Javier..........
Was an Iraq vet. (true)
firefight after firefight, death, destruction, bodyparts etc. ( unbearably false)
Was in a firefight where everyone ran out of ammo and it ended up in HAND TO HAND combat, where he was stabbed, and he killed a bad guy with his knife. ( retardedly false)
It goes on and on, but I wont bore you with what happenned after lol. He is not on my job anymore, in fact doesnt even work in the same field as I do anymore. It was pretty awesome.
 
When ever someone spouts pure B.S. about something I NEVER let it go, specially if it is something that I myself do know about from years of training, study and actual personal experience.
Not just the usual friend of a friend who once told me crap.
I call them out immediately on it and even go as far as to make them repeat what they have said and see if they can pick up on the obvious B.S. they are throwing.
If they do not then I point it out to them word by word.
If you do not stop these people they continue to get more and more confident and then they start to actually believe their own crap as well as begin to misinform new people that truly do not know.
This in some cases can lead to innocent people taking bad info and getting hurt, which I have no tolerance for at all.
I think it is important to jump on them and stamp this behavior out like the plague so they will know that it is not acceptable.
If you want to tell lies and spread stories then do it with something like fishing or baseball but never with firearms where the stakes are just way to high to take chances.
Yes I do have to admit that the sadistic side of me truly enjoys the shredding of a total ignorant a-hole when they are up on the soap box and drawing a crowd.
Um wait, is that me now? oh well enough said.
 
Lesson: Don't bull**** engineers. [smile]
Wrench75 said:
HAHAHA! I worked with one of them ~20 yrs ago at texas instruments. His name was Javier Cruz. I'll never forget him. He made up some of the best stories. If you gave him even the slightest bit of encouragement he would go on and on. He used to love telling people how he was a master in Dim Mak, AKA The Touch of Death. He said that the reason he left whatever 3rd world shithole he is from and came here is because he accidentally killed his master during a sparring session. [rofl2]

I think the best story came out the day I rode my new motorcycle in to work. A few friends and I were having a conversation about bikes when he jumped in. He started telling us about his bike, which of course was a ninja, and all the mods he had done to it. How it was so fast it was actually illegal in this country! lol So I had to ask, "How fast is it?"

He said he wasn't sure what the exact top speed was because they don't make a speedometer that goes high enough... Of course they don't how silly of me not to realize. [rolleyes] He then went on to describe, "this one time", when he went under the fall river gov center overpass at full speed and made it from there to providence in... wait for it....... 12 sec. [rofl2][rofl2]

I swear I could hear the eyes rolling in the room. By this time there are about 15 people listening to his shit. So I casually bust out the calculator on my side and do a little quick math. Then the fun started.

me- "Wow. Was it tough weaving through traffic traveling at over a mile per second?"

him- "No."

me- "What was it like breaking the sound barrier on a motorcycle?"

him "Huh?"

me- "Well you had to be traveling at 4500 MPH to go 15 miles in 12 seconds."

him- "well I must have been. Like I said I don't have a speedometer" [rolleyes]

me, holding back hysterical laughter,- "How did you breath? At that speed if you took a breath the pressure would have destroyed your lungs."

him- "I held my breath. It was only 12 seconds..." [banghead] I should have known

me- "You should have called guiness. The previous land speed record was around 700 MPH and it took several rocket engines to reach that speed."

him- stammer stammer...

me- "Hell you beat the old record by 6.5X. At that speed you were traveling at just under 6x the speed of sound. That is hypervelocity. That pretty much makes your motorcycle the fastest thing on the planet!

By that point everyone had erupted in hysterical laughter and he was taking a good hard look at whatever was on the top of his shoes... [rofl2] [rofl2]

Just because I'm a prick I didn't let up and started asking mod and physics questions.
"How long is your swing arm? What did you have to do aerodynamically to keep the pike from flipping. How do your carbs get air when you are essentially traveling in a vacuum? How do you hold on to the bars at those speeds? How did your tire not pop from the heat of compressing the air when traveling that fast? If you started breaking in providence, were you in CT by the time you came to a stop?

It was epic. After that I asked him every day when he was going to bring the bike in so we could go for a cruise at lunch. [rofl2] I never did get to se that bike... [sad]
Click to expand...
 
Wrench75 said:
LOL For your sake I hope not. He is short and stocky and from either PR or DR I think. It was amazing the lengths he would go to one up someone. If you told him you caught a 30 lb striper while out on your friend's boat. He would tell you about the time he caught a marlin while fishing off the shore. Seriously.

You almost have to wonder if these people are so delusional that they actually believe the shit they say. You would think that, after a conversation like the one in my last post, he would have just never spoken to me again. Nope.

The next day it was like it never happened. Like he went home and just rewrote the entire encounter in his mind so that it all worked out for him. No small part of the reason I lit him up was because I was sick of hearing his shit 12 hrs a day. I figured it would get my point across and he would just go bother other people. It did not have the desired effect... [sad]
Click to expand...

Terminal one upper. Most large companies have at least one and they are usually friends with the " I know someone who knew someone" guy.
 
dhuze said:
The SHO was molded into the body trim.


9061d1249311912-1994-taurus-sho-picture-140.jpg
Click to expand...

Sorry for the Hijack but I had a 1990 ... one of my favorite cars !
Back to topic.. some people are just so used to be full of it in order to impress others, they don't even realize how stupid they sound. Best to just smile and walk away
 
Oh... there are some real gems that meat gaze when I'm in uniform, and then come up with some whoppers. They must think I'm one of those cops that isn't a gun guy. ;)

I'll have to try and remember some gems.
 
haha. nope.

I can tell you how they ALL start... awkward stroll up... oh hey... nice weather, nice glock whats that a 40?

Me: It's an M&P 45

them: oh yeah... I heard those are good too
 
Last edited by a moderator:
met a neighbor when we first moved into the 'hood. Nice enough guy, nice wife; but he constantly had a story on his background. When I met him he was 34 or so, was a LU103 Electrician. But supposedly he had been:
- a field superintendent for Macomber construction, on one of their largest projects at Boston College
- A sniper for the MA State Police
- a member of the MSP, 'violent warrant team'
- taken a 410 shotgun blast, thru a door, center of his vest, while serving a warrant (that's why he quit)
- 4yrs Marines

He's sitting at my kitchen table spilling this shit out, I'm trying to back into the age of the guy, knowing he's out of the Marines at 22, the apprenticeship program at LU103 is 5yrs, etc. Then I remembered a buddy who worked at Macomber, as PM on the BC project.
While this guy is at my table, I quietly call my buddy Frank. [wink] "Hey, I have Bill Smith at my kitchen table, telling me he was the super on the Higgins Hall project...do you know him?"
the wife heard Frank laughing across the room on my phone. "he's a bum, a drunk, pill head, he was a laborer on the project"
Was he on the MSP?
" at our last xmas party, he's sitting there hammered, his beeper goes off, he gets up and announces his part time job as a sniper for the MSP is calling him , for a hostage situation!"

Frank's asking me..'let me talk to him....please!!' [rofl]
I couldn't do it.....he was dead 5yrs later from all the pharmaceuticals he was mixing.
 
Wrench75 said:
HAHAHA! I worked with one of them ~20 yrs ago at texas instruments. His name was Javier Cruz. I'll never forget him. He made up some of the best stories. If you gave him even the slightest bit of encouragement he would go on and on. He used to love telling people how he was a master in Dim Mak, AKA The Touch of Death. He said that the reason he left whatever 3rd world shithole he is from and came here is because he accidentally killed his master during a sparring session. [rofl2]

I think the best story came out the day I rode my new motorcycle in to work. A few friends and I were having a conversation about bikes when he jumped in. He started telling us about his bike, which of course was a ninja, and all the mods he had done to it. How it was so fast it was actually illegal in this country! lol So I had to ask, "How fast is it?"

He said he wasn't sure what the exact top speed was because they don't make a speedometer that goes high enough... Of course they don't how silly of me not to realize. [rolleyes] He then went on to describe, "this one time", when he went under the fall river gov center overpass at full speed and made it from there to providence in... wait for it....... 12 sec. [rofl2][rofl2]

I swear I could hear the eyes rolling in the room. By this time there are about 15 people listening to his shit. So I casually bust out the calculator on my side and do a little quick math. Then the fun started.

me- "Wow. Was it tough weaving through traffic traveling at over a mile per second?"

him- "No."

me- "What was it like breaking the sound barrier on a motorcycle?"

him "Huh?"

me- "Well you had to be traveling at 4500 MPH to go 15 miles in 12 seconds."

him- "well I must have been. Like I said I don't have a speedometer" [rolleyes]

me, holding back hysterical laughter,- "How did you breath? At that speed if you took a breath the pressure would have destroyed your lungs."

him- "I held my breath. It was only 12 seconds..." [banghead] I should have known

me- "You should have called guiness. The previous land speed record was around 700 MPH and it took several rocket engines to reach that speed."

him- stammer stammer...

me- "Hell you beat the old record by 6.5X. At that speed you were traveling at just under 6x the speed of sound. That is hypervelocity. That pretty much makes your motorcycle the fastest thing on the planet!

By that point everyone had erupted in hysterical laughter and he was taking a good hard look at whatever was on the top of his shoes... [rofl2] [rofl2]

Just because I'm a prick I didn't let up and started asking mod and physics questions.
"How long is your swing arm? What did you have to do aerodynamically to keep the pike from flipping. How do your carbs get air when you are essentially traveling in a vacuum? How do you hold on to the bars at those speeds? How did your tire not pop from the heat of compressing the air when traveling that fast? If you started breaking in providence, were you in CT by the time you came to a stop?

It was epic. After that I asked him every day when he was going to bring the bike in so we could go for a cruise at lunch. [rofl2] I never did get to se that bike... [sad]
Click to expand...

http://youtu.be/CF7OnW4XDck
 
GPP said:
Just a quickie of our Javier..........
Was an Iraq vet. (true)
firefight after firefight, death, destruction, bodyparts etc. ( unbearably false)
Was in a firefight where everyone ran out of ammo and it ended up in HAND TO HAND combat, where he was stabbed, and he killed a bad guy with his knife. ( retardedly false)
It goes on and on, but I wont bore you with what happenned after lol. He is not on my job anymore, in fact doesnt even work in the same field as I do anymore. It was pretty awesome.
Click to expand...

My father, father in law, and grandfather (all combat vets).....as I am now.........all told me that those who have seen the "most" talk about it the "least". Now THAT is the ****ing truth! For my father in law when he spoke to me about it was actually teaching me a lesson in humility. Think about it.....and you might understand what my father in law was telling me......he was a GREAT man.
 
Last edited:
chrbla2000 said:
The best one I heard in the past, and I'm paraphrasing:

Him: "I shoot too, in fact, I bored out my .22 revolver to shoot .45"
Me, (deadpan) "awesome, you need to show that to me"
Him, "...naw, it ain't exactly legal, so until I know you better, it'll stay locked away."

-chris
Click to expand...

dgrantdoherty said:
hahah i went green to read it....
Click to expand...

Good enough Reason,
 
Palladin said:
met a neighbor when we first moved into the 'hood. Nice enough guy, nice wife; but he constantly had a story on his background. When I met him he was 34 or so, was a LU103 Electrician. But supposedly he had been:
- a field superintendent for Macomber construction, on one of their largest projects at Boston College
- A sniper for the MA State Police
- a member of the MSP, 'violent warrant team'
- taken a 410 shotgun blast, thru a door, center of his vest, while serving a warrant (that's why he quit)
- 4yrs Marines

He's sitting at my kitchen table spilling this shit out, I'm trying to back into the age of the guy, knowing he's out of the Marines at 22, the apprenticeship program at LU103 is 5yrs, etc. Then I remembered a buddy who worked at Macomber, as PM on the BC project.
While this guy is at my table, I quietly call my buddy Frank. [wink] "Hey, I have Bill Smith at my kitchen table, telling me he was the super on the Higgins Hall project...do you know him?"
the wife heard Frank laughing across the room on my phone. "he's a bum, a drunk, pill head, he was a laborer on the project"
Was he on the MSP?
" at our last xmas party, he's sitting there hammered, his beeper goes off, he gets up and announces his part time job as a sniper for the MSP is calling him , for a hostage situation!"

Frank's asking me..'let me talk to him....please!!' [rofl]
I couldn't do it.....he was dead 5yrs later from all the pharmaceuticals he was mixing.
Click to expand...

Maybe he's related to Grendel? [rofl]

-Mike
 
AngelKing said:
I wore a Glock USA T shirt to the office today. I had to be in for 5AM to open, so I really didn't give a rat's ass. Our former warehouse manager is now a delivery driver, so I saw this clown first. "oh I have guns too. I shoot in competitions." Really (this guy is full of shit always, so I wanted to hear what he had to say) what kinds of shoots do you do? I was thinking of getting into practical shooting one of these days. "military matches, tactical matches." Oh, what associations? "military ones." (the guy never was in the military, but did tell me he was trained as a ninja, ate deer hearts for the antibiotic properties and that his mother is an Indian Medicine woman. -Ah, yes, the military ones. What kind of weapon are you running? "I had it custom made. Its a Colt .45, compensated with a 3 round burst." -Huh? "Its just like the one on Robocop." - you own and compete with the gun Robocop used? "yeah, the same one!" I didn't call him out on it. The kid is so full of shit, his eyes are brown. Either way, great fiction.
Click to expand...
Are you sure he's an idiot and not epic trolling you?
 
AngelKing said:
I wore a Glock USA T shirt to the office today. I had to be in for 5AM to open, so I really didn't give a rat's ass. Our former warehouse manager is now a delivery driver, so I saw this clown first.

"oh I have guns too. I shoot in competitions."

Really (this guy is full of shit always, so I wanted to hear what he had to say) what kinds of shoots do you do? I was thinking of getting into practical shooting one of these days.

"military matches, tactical matches."

Oh, what associations?

"military ones." (the guy never was in the military, but did tell me he was trained as a ninja, ate deer hearts for the antibiotic properties and that his mother is an Indian Medicine woman.

-Ah, yes, the military ones. What kind of weapon are you running?

"I had it custom made. Its a Colt .45, compensated with a 3 round burst."

-Huh?

"Its just like the one on Robocop."

- you own and compete with the gun Robocop used?

"yeah, the same one!"

I didn't call him out on it. The kid is so full of shit, his eyes are brown. Either way, great fiction.
Click to expand...

Was his first name Bob?
 
I used to work with a guy like this. The stories.....ooomphf. The first one was a doozy. He was a marine sniper, had numerous kills under his belt from when he went to iraq.....the first time. Apparently part of his sniper training was to be taken out to some random village in some third world shithole and shoot a woman and her child. They needed to breed compassion out of him. The second was that he bought consecutive serial barrett 50s for 1200 bucks. It was just too good a deal to pass on....WAT?

I'm sure if I pressed my poor little brain to remember I could regale you all in some real wackadoo shit, but Ive made it a point to purge the system [laugh]
 

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