SIGNS IN ENGLISH
In a Bangkok temple:
"IT IS FORBIDDEN TO ENTER A WOMAN, EVEN A FOREIGNER,
IF DRESSED AS A MAN."
Cocktail lounge, Norway:
"LADIES ARE REQUESTED NOT TO HAVE CHILDREN IN THE
BAR."
Doctors office, Rome:
"SPECIALIST IN WOMEN AND OTHER DISEASES.
Dry cleaners, Bangkok:
"DROP YOUR TROUSERS HERE FOR THE BEST RESULTS"
In a Nairobi restaurant:
"CUSTOMERS WHO FIND OUR WAITRESSES RUDE OUGHT TO SEE
THE MANAGER"
On an Athi River highway, the main road to Mombasa,
leaving Nairobi:
"TAKE NOTICE: WHEN THIS SIGN IS UNDER WATER, THIS
ROAD IS IMPASSABLE."
On a poster at Kencom:
"ARE YOU AN ADULT THAT CANNOT READ? IF SO, WE CAN
HELP."
In a City restaurant:
"OPEN SEVEN DAYS A WEEK AND WEEKENDS."
On an automatic hand dryer in a restroom:
"DO NOT ACTIVATE WITH WET HANDS"
In a cemetery:
"PERSONS ARE PROHIBITED FROM PICKING FLOWERS FROM
ANY BUT THEIR OWN GRAVES"
Tokyo hotel's rules and regulations:
"GUESTS ARE REQUESTED NOT TO SMOKE OR DO OTHER
DISGUSTING BEHAVIOURS IN BED."
On the menu of a Swiss restaurant:
"OUR WINES LEAVE YOU NOTHING TO HOPE FOR"
In a Tokyo bar:
"SPECIAL COCKTAILS FOR THE LADIES WITH NUTS"
Hotel, Yugoslavia:
"THE FLATTENING OF UNDERWEAR WITH PLEASURE IS THE
JOB OF THE CHAMBERMAID"
Hotel, Japan:
"YOU ARE INVITED TO TAKE ADVANTAGE OF THE
CHAMBERMAID"
In the lobby of a Moscow hotel across from a Russian
Orthodox monastery:
"YOU ARE WELCOME TO VISIT THE CEMETERY WHERE FAMOUS
RUSSIAN AND SOVIE COMPOSERS, ARTISTS, AND WRITERS \
ARE BURIED DAILY EXCEPT THURSDAY"
A sign posted in Germany's Black Forest:
"IT IS STRICTLY FORBIDDEN ON OUR BLACK FOREST
CAMPING SITE THAT PEOPLE OF DIFFERENT SEX, FO R
INSTANCE, MEN AND WOMEN, LIVE TOGETHER IN ONE
TENT UNLESS THEY ARE MARRIED WITH EACH OTHER FOR
THIS PURPOSE."
Hotel, Zurich:
"BECAUSE OF THE IMPROPRIETY OF ENTERTAINING GUESTS
OF THE OPPOSITE SEX IN THE BEDROOM, IT IS SUGGESTED \
THAT THE LOBBY BE USED FOR THIS PURPOSE"
Advertisement for donkey rides, Thailand:
"WOULD YOU LIKE TO RIDE ON YOUR OWN ASS?"
The box of a clockwork toy made in Hong Kong:
"GUARANTEED TO WORK THROUGHOUT ITS USEFUL LIFE"
In a Swiss Mountain inn:
"SPECIAL TODAY - NO ICE-CREAM"
Airline ticket office, Copenhagen:
"WE TAKE YOUR BAGS AND SEND THEM IN ALL DIRECTIONS"
A laundry in Rome:
"LADIES, LEAVE YOUR CLOTHES HERE AND SPEND THE
AFTERNOON HAVING A GOOD TIME"
In Karachi, over the inside of the door is a sign
that reads:
" VEGETABLES SERVED HERE ARE WASHED IN WATER
PERSONALLY PASSED BY THE OWNER."