Okay, maybe they can't but... imagine if they could
- Speeding is now a felony
- Any act of civil disobedience is a felony
- Spitting on the ground is a felony
- J-walking is a felony
- Parking tickets if not paid in 2 days are a felony
- Double parking is a felony
- Being a Conservative is a felony
- Running a red light is a felony
- Viewing porn online is a felony
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