http://mensnewsdaily.com/blog/malven/2006/01/america-that-might-have-been-todays.html
The America That Might Have Been (Today’s Massachusetts)
The scene, Massachusetts, April 18, 1775:
Boston Globe -- Governor General Thomas Gage has decided to move in and seize a cache of registered firearms gathered by a few members of the NRA, a radical organisation which believes that the citizens should have an unfettered right to keep and bear arms, to fight against the “Intolerable Acts.” These radicals are suspected of possessing highly dangerous and illegal “assault rifles.”
After receiving warning of Gage’s move, ungrateful “Whigs,” William Dawes and Paul Revere ride out through the country side to warn their fellow radicals that our fine British "Regulars are coming!”
In Lexington, beloved, old, fat, Teddy “Lady Killer” Kennedy is roused from his drunken slumber by the cries of Samuel Prescott as he cravenly rides through the town crying his “warning.” Teddy stumbles over to the window of his palatial suite at the Lexington Arms Hotel to see what all the commotion is about. Realising the radical nature of the traitor Prescott’s mission, and as a Tory, and a supporter of the reasonable taxes the Crown has imposed on those ungrateful Colonists, he immediately calls the local garrison of British troops to complain about this trouble maker, then calls the Heinz household and asks to speak with John Kerry-Heinz, who (I would be remiss in not mentioning) served in Vietnam.
In rapid order, there is a meeting of their fellow Tory Party members, John Oliver, Richard Neal, Jim McGovern, Barney Frank, Marty Meehan, John Tierney, Ed Markey, Michael Capuano, Stephan Lynch, and William Delahunt. After endless speechmaking, they decide unanimously to call the Governor General and warn him that these so called Patriots, “tax-cutters and gun-nuts” all, are gathering at Lexington.
In response to the this unanimous call by the entire membership of the Massachusetts’ leadership, Governor General Thomas Gage moves a contingent of Royal Troops into Lexington where they, in their fine, brightly coloured uniforms crush the budding rebellion. A large crowd of Loyalists gathered to cheer on our troops. Very few Patriots were in attendance. It’s good to know that the state of Massachusetts has such a large Tory majority.
The 75 rebels, led by Captain John Parker, were quickly defeated as their hunting rifles and pistols were no match for the Royal Troops and the automatic assault rifles carrying 30 rounds each. Throughout the state of Massachusetts, with the aid of the overwhelming Tory majority providing information, the rebel NRA members were quickly rounded up and imprisoned.
Adams has been picked up by an alert officer of the law for driving without a seatbelt and Hancock was imprisoned after being stopped for riding his bicycle without a helmet. Both men, being wanted on a warrant for treason were summarily executed after a brief hearing.
Today, the United British Colonies of America owes its continued existence to Loyalists like Senators John Kerry-Heinz and Teddy “Lady Killer” Kennedy and Representatives Markey, Frank Meehan and the rest of the Massachusetts contingent.
Far fetched? Think about it. Today’s Democrat Party is the Tory Party of pre-revolutionary America. It is the party of higher federal taxes, greater federal power, and limited individual freedom.
Those values which the Whig Party of our founding fathers held so dear are the same as those which today’s Conservatives value. The “Progressives and Liberals” of 1776 America would feel much more at home in the Republican Party than the Democrat Party of today’s “Progressives and Liberals.”
The Liberals of today support a state controlled National Health Service, federal gun control (subversion of the 2nd Amendment), federal funding for elections (subversion of the 1st Amendment), greater federal spending on and control of education, redistribution of wealth (the antithesis of our free enterprise economy), and an activist judiciary which can make laws without them being voted on by any representative of the people (subversion of the 1st, 2nd, and 3rd Articles of the Constitution).
Were Jefferson, Hancock, Adams, Franklin and the rest of the founders of our nation around today, they would call themselves Conservatives and most would be members of the Republican Party. Most would also probably desire substantial changes in the modern Republican Party in hopes of returning to a government closer to the one the Constitution set up. None would have any desire to be associated with today’s Liberals.
They would not understand people wishing to remove any reference of God from the public arena. They would not understand the idea of murdering two generations of unborn children as a mere matter of “convenience” for the mother. They would not be able to comprehend the American people who wanted the Government to take over their lives by taking fifty percent of every dollar they earn. They would not understand those who wanted to redistribute wealth by penalizing those who earn the most and giving the proceeds to those who contribute the least to the society and economy.
Thank God those men believed the way they did and not in some form of democratic, socialist, monarchy.
posted by Will Malven
The America That Might Have Been (Today’s Massachusetts)
The scene, Massachusetts, April 18, 1775:
Boston Globe -- Governor General Thomas Gage has decided to move in and seize a cache of registered firearms gathered by a few members of the NRA, a radical organisation which believes that the citizens should have an unfettered right to keep and bear arms, to fight against the “Intolerable Acts.” These radicals are suspected of possessing highly dangerous and illegal “assault rifles.”
After receiving warning of Gage’s move, ungrateful “Whigs,” William Dawes and Paul Revere ride out through the country side to warn their fellow radicals that our fine British "Regulars are coming!”
In Lexington, beloved, old, fat, Teddy “Lady Killer” Kennedy is roused from his drunken slumber by the cries of Samuel Prescott as he cravenly rides through the town crying his “warning.” Teddy stumbles over to the window of his palatial suite at the Lexington Arms Hotel to see what all the commotion is about. Realising the radical nature of the traitor Prescott’s mission, and as a Tory, and a supporter of the reasonable taxes the Crown has imposed on those ungrateful Colonists, he immediately calls the local garrison of British troops to complain about this trouble maker, then calls the Heinz household and asks to speak with John Kerry-Heinz, who (I would be remiss in not mentioning) served in Vietnam.
In rapid order, there is a meeting of their fellow Tory Party members, John Oliver, Richard Neal, Jim McGovern, Barney Frank, Marty Meehan, John Tierney, Ed Markey, Michael Capuano, Stephan Lynch, and William Delahunt. After endless speechmaking, they decide unanimously to call the Governor General and warn him that these so called Patriots, “tax-cutters and gun-nuts” all, are gathering at Lexington.
In response to the this unanimous call by the entire membership of the Massachusetts’ leadership, Governor General Thomas Gage moves a contingent of Royal Troops into Lexington where they, in their fine, brightly coloured uniforms crush the budding rebellion. A large crowd of Loyalists gathered to cheer on our troops. Very few Patriots were in attendance. It’s good to know that the state of Massachusetts has such a large Tory majority.
The 75 rebels, led by Captain John Parker, were quickly defeated as their hunting rifles and pistols were no match for the Royal Troops and the automatic assault rifles carrying 30 rounds each. Throughout the state of Massachusetts, with the aid of the overwhelming Tory majority providing information, the rebel NRA members were quickly rounded up and imprisoned.
Adams has been picked up by an alert officer of the law for driving without a seatbelt and Hancock was imprisoned after being stopped for riding his bicycle without a helmet. Both men, being wanted on a warrant for treason were summarily executed after a brief hearing.
Today, the United British Colonies of America owes its continued existence to Loyalists like Senators John Kerry-Heinz and Teddy “Lady Killer” Kennedy and Representatives Markey, Frank Meehan and the rest of the Massachusetts contingent.
Far fetched? Think about it. Today’s Democrat Party is the Tory Party of pre-revolutionary America. It is the party of higher federal taxes, greater federal power, and limited individual freedom.
Those values which the Whig Party of our founding fathers held so dear are the same as those which today’s Conservatives value. The “Progressives and Liberals” of 1776 America would feel much more at home in the Republican Party than the Democrat Party of today’s “Progressives and Liberals.”
The Liberals of today support a state controlled National Health Service, federal gun control (subversion of the 2nd Amendment), federal funding for elections (subversion of the 1st Amendment), greater federal spending on and control of education, redistribution of wealth (the antithesis of our free enterprise economy), and an activist judiciary which can make laws without them being voted on by any representative of the people (subversion of the 1st, 2nd, and 3rd Articles of the Constitution).
Were Jefferson, Hancock, Adams, Franklin and the rest of the founders of our nation around today, they would call themselves Conservatives and most would be members of the Republican Party. Most would also probably desire substantial changes in the modern Republican Party in hopes of returning to a government closer to the one the Constitution set up. None would have any desire to be associated with today’s Liberals.
They would not understand people wishing to remove any reference of God from the public arena. They would not understand the idea of murdering two generations of unborn children as a mere matter of “convenience” for the mother. They would not be able to comprehend the American people who wanted the Government to take over their lives by taking fifty percent of every dollar they earn. They would not understand those who wanted to redistribute wealth by penalizing those who earn the most and giving the proceeds to those who contribute the least to the society and economy.
Thank God those men believed the way they did and not in some form of democratic, socialist, monarchy.
posted by Will Malven