Dealing with people that know you are a Prepper

[Mattyweb]

What my wife doesn't know, she can't tell to others. I have found this to be more reliable than expecting her to keep a secret.

That being said, my friends all know me and think this is the place to go anyway. I have at least been successful in pushing them all to get their LTCs and learn to shoot. Most of my friends garden, keep livestock, can food, etc. I approach this from the quality of the food perspective.

 

[newenglandjeff]

Have a list of items they will need to have with them ready for when they start up with the "I'll come to your place" crap. Tell them to inform you when the list is complete, so you can give them another list. That should show who's serious. Any time it comes up after you've given them a list, ask how their progress is going obtaining the items on their current list.

 

[dennism]

Getting all serious in response to that question is the definition of doing it wrong. Makes it look.like you have things to hide.

 

[71montess]

My wife has a friend that jokes about me carrying. Every time a bunch of us couples get together this guy says " hey, u carrying? One time he says to the group, " hey everyone john's packin". Outside at one of these parties I laid into him. He really thought he was just funney, said to him once Ya, six times, you're an a hole. So sometimes you got to pull a holes aside and straighten them out.

 

[Kevin_NH]

Getting all serious in response to that question is the definition of doing it wrong. Makes it look.like you have things to hide.

On the upside, if you take my approach, you either shut them up, or you get ten grand more to spend at provident pantry. Win-Win.

 

[Prepper]

No one knows I'm a prepper, so this won't be an issue for me.

 

[garandman]

And here I thought pooling resources among the community was a source of strength.

 

[fubar]

I keep a bucket of water balloons under the stairs window , over the front door.
If you won't go away I'll throw one at you.

 

[FrugalFannie]

And here I thought pooling resources among the community was a source of strength.

The OPs situation was people who DONT prepare thinking they were going to go suck up his resources. Sharing this info with other people who prepare and would POOL resources is different.

 

[mark056]

And here I thought pooling resources among the community was a source of strength.

Unfortunately in this era of "Me first, Me always" the pooling of resources is not part of the equation. If you are prepared, and people will come to you thinking you owe them and that they are entitled to your stuff. Recall the Aesop fable of the Grasshopper and the Ant. If like minded people band together that is one thing, and there are prepper communities out there, but the fabric of society is such to today that we will probably see rule by mob, exploitation by the strong. People with special skills might be welcome, a nurse or a physician might be an exception, an English professor no way. A combat infantryman from the Army or Marines with service in Afghanistan or Iraq might be welcome, a sonar technician on a nuclear submarine no way. If you are old, chronically ill, can do nothing to contribute then sadly and I mean sadly you wouldn't make the cut. We would be going back to the tribal days where the needs of the few outweigh the needs of the many and there will be many with needs but no survival skills. It is the few, who have the skills and the ability to rebuild, and repopulate after collapse who must survive.

I realize fully well that my post is odious, and may have overtones that some might find distressing and might lead them to places that even I would not go, but the simple fact is that if there were a total breakdown and some kind of apocalyptic event and a dystopian future, your survival and that of your family becomes paramount and on a larger level, maybe species survival. It is been estimated that 99 percent of all species who have lived on the earth are extinct.

The survivors are going to have to make some really hard choices, and natural selection will once again become a dynamic survival. Brother will be pitted against brother, neighbor against neighbor, crimes too horrific to contemplate will be comiited, infant mortality rates will soar and diseases that would have been preventable or cured will proliferate. Not a cheerful prognosis to be sure. There will be pockets of law and order and well structured communities, I don't think Detroit or even Boston will be among them. In the first days, it will be every one, or every family for themselves until the weak and unprepared are weeded out IMO. I wish it were not so, but history and biology tends to support that point of view.

 

[jibbr71]

Unfortunately in this era of "Me first, Me always" the pooling of resources is not part of the equation. If you are prepared, and people will come to you thinking you owe them and that they are entitled to your stuff. Recall the Aesop fable of the Grasshopper and the Ant. If like minded people band together that is one thing, and there are prepper communities out there, but the fabric of society is such to today that we will probably see rule by mob, exploitation by the strong. People with special skills might be welcome, a nurse or a physician might be an exception, an English professor no way. A combat infantryman from the Army or Marines with service in Afghanistan or Iraq might be welcome, a sonar technician on a nuclear submarine no way. If you are old, chronically ill, can do nothing to contribute then sadly and I mean sadly you wouldn't make the cut. We would be going back to the tribal days where the needs of the few outweigh the needs of the many and there will be many with needs but no survival skills. It is the few, who have the skills and the ability to rebuild, and repopulate after collapse who must survive.

I realize fully well that my post is odious, and may have overtones that some might find distressing and might lead them to places that even I would not go, but the simple fact is that if there were a total breakdown and some kind of apocalyptic event and a dystopian future, your survival and that of your family becomes paramount and on a larger level, maybe species survival. It is been estimated that 99 percent of all species who have lived on the earth are extinct.

The survivors are going to have to make some really hard choices, and natural selection will once again become a dynamic survival. Brother will be pitted against brother, neighbor against neighbor, crimes too horrific to contemplate will be comiited, infant mortality rates will soar and diseases that would have been preventable or cured will proliferate. Not a cheerful prognosis to be sure. There will be pockets of law and order and well structured communities, I don't think Detroit or even Boston will be among them. In the first days, it will be every one, or every family for themselves until the weak and unprepared are weeded out IMO. I wish it were not so, but history and biology tends to support that point of view.

This is truth. Some will take issue with it, I've seen it happen to Mark in another thread. Even those who are "prepper minded" will have a hard time with these choices. IMHO, it's best to keep your trap shut, network with people local to you who have the same mindset(though this is tough to gauge with my first piece of advice), and bolster the principles that will guide you through those tough choices should the unthinkable happen. Also, these choices won't just be relegated to a TEOTWAKI scenario; should something like Katrina hit NE, it WILL be catastrophic. Sandy and the ice storms will seem like spring showers, and those choices will have to be made.

 

[Cowgirlup]

Probably not a good idea - half of 'em talk about just stealing sh#t from others if/when the need arises.

Not the sort I'd want at my back.

That's why it's a good idea to pay attention to what and how people post here. Raider wanna-be's and A-holes in general are not the people I want to know even casually at a meet up. Definitely don't want to do any business with them here either.

Maybe us NES preppers should combine forces. Individually we're all good to go, but as a group we could really kick butt.

It always sounds like a good idea but even within this group it's hard to find people who are all on the same page. I like the idea of a mutual aid type group. Maybe everyone isn't all meeting at one location but you have the group as a whole to help with a project or maybe someone needs a certain type of spark plug to get something going, providing the internet is still working and travel isn't too restricted. But then we sort of already have that here. Plus everyone is really spread out.

No one knows I'm a prepper, so this won't be an issue for me.

Says the guy who has a username of "Prepper". J/K



Call me weak but I'm probably not shooting any of our friends if they show up here peacefully. Some while not prepping have useful skills we don't have. One couple with no real skills can provide some manual labor, keep watch etc. I guess it's a plus we don't have too many friends. LOL

 

[mark056]

That's why it's a good idea to pay attention to what and how people post here. Raider wanna-be's and A-holes in general are not the people I want to know even casually at a meet up. Definitely don't want to do any business with them here either.


It always sounds like a good idea but even within this group it's hard to find people who are all on the same page. I like the idea of a mutual aid type group. Maybe everyone isn't all meeting at one location but you have the group as a whole to help with a project or maybe someone needs a certain type of spark plug to get something going, providing the internet is still working and travel isn't too restricted. But then we sort of already have that here. Plus everyone is really spread out.


Says the guy who has a username of "Prepper". J/K



Call me weak but I'm probably not shooting any of our friends if they show up here peacefully. Some while not prepping have useful skills we don't have. One couple with no real skills can provide some manual labor, keep watch etc. I guess it's a plus we don't have too many friends. LOL

Given the individualistic traits exhibited by many members of this forum, I don't know how many could cooperate as team members. There are a lot of folks here who have trouble with people telling them what to do, and having a leader is essential in a group survival situation. Ain't gonna be no committees and the needs of the group come first and foremost.

You realize that in your last paragraph you are laying the groundwork for a sort of neo-feudalism where people with no prepper skills provide manual labor and other grunt work at the bottom. They become the foundation of the neo-serf class. What was feudalism? It was the weak going to the strong and providing manual labor in exchange for protection by the warrior class. In time this became very institutionalized and given our homo sapien predisposition for creating social hierarchies it wouldn't take more than a generation to establish a warrior/ruling class with weapons and a serf class who provide manual labor (things would be more labor intensive, no doubt assuming much of our energy and mechanized infrastructure was degraded or gone). In other words, the guys with the guns rule, even the good guys, just like the guys with the lances and broadswords and horses did back in the Middle Ages. They got the best nutrition, the best women, the best places to live but in turn they protected the weak, the people who couldn't survive on their own initially, and then it became institutionalized. So survive and stick around, and who knows just because you have guns, food, maybe some gold and a hardened site to live in, you might become the Baroness of Agawam or something similar

 

[Cowgirlup]

Given the individualistic traits exhibited by many members of this forum, I don't know how many could cooperate as team members. There are a lot of folks here who have trouble with people telling them what to do, and having a leader is essential in a group survival situation. Ain't gonna be no committees and the needs of the group come first and foremost.

You realize that in your last paragraph you are laying the groundwork for a sort of neo-feudalism where people with no prepper skills provide manual labor and other grunt work at the bottom. They become the foundation of the neo-serf class. What was feudalism? It was the weak going to the strong and providing manual labor in exchange for protection by the warrior class. In time this became very institutionalized and given our homo sapien predisposition for creating social hierarchies it wouldn't take more than a generation to establish a warrior/ruling class with weapons and a serf class who provide manual labor (things would be more labor intensive, no doubt assuming much of our energy and mechanized infrastructure was degraded or gone). In other words, the guys with the guns rule, even the good guys, just like the guys with the lances and broadswords and horses did back in the Middle Ages. They got the best nutrition, the best women, the best places to live but in turn they protected the weak, the people who couldn't survive on their own initially, and then it became institutionalized. So survive and stick around, and who knows just because you have guns, food, maybe some gold and a hardened site to live in, you might become the Baroness of Agawam or something similar

LOL!
Well, if they didn't want to be a serf then they should have listened and done something to help themselves. And there is always the chance that something could go horribly wrong with our plans. In that case I would be happy for a space on some ones floor and some gruel in exchange for toting firewood, cleaning out the animal pens, spading the garden, standing guard or whatever needs to be done. At least I would show up with some useful skills.

 

[Lip]

I casually ask if they've seen the movie the road, if they have, I point out you don't want to be the people in the basement.

 

[Mr. Gold]

Given the individualistic traits exhibited by many members of this forum, I don't know how many could cooperate as team members. There are a lot of folks here who have trouble with people telling them what to do, and having a leader is essential in a group survival situation. Ain't gonna be no committees and the needs of the group come first and foremost.

Disagree.
This entire idea of "Leader" has really been overblown. Groups can function just fine, possibly (and I say probably) without a leader, if they contain the right people, and preppers are those types of people, most of the time.
It's a matter of outlook and perspective.

On a personal note, the notion of leadership and the hype about it with regards to modern life has much to do with pop culture (movies, sports etc), which always look for the "leader", the "best" and so on, kinda childish and corny.

I take care of my own family, done deal, that's where the leadership stops, beyond me, any other group or person will need to get my agreement on anything pertaining my family's well being. If someone else has something I want and don't have, it's going to be one hand washes the other type of dynamic, rather then "let me tell you what to do".
I would expect other families to be just the same: not to take any directions from anyone with regards to their well being, unless a mutual agreement is reached. IMO, that's how things will turn out, those who will be prepared are not the shipple ones, by definition.
I don't think they'll be looking for a leader to save or lead them, that's why they were keeping busy prepping, rather then watching TV and spending their disposable income on useless toys.

 

[teaser452]

Disagree.
This entire idea of "Leader" has really been overblown. Groups can function just fine, possibly (and I say probably) without a leader, if they contain the right people, and preppers are those types of people, most of the time.
It's a matter of outlook and perspective.

On a personal note, the notion of leadership and the hype about it with regards to modern life has much to do with pop culture (movies, sports etc), which always look for the "leader", the "best" and so on, kinda childish and corny.

I take care of my own family, done deal, that's where the leadership stops, beyond me, any other group or person will need to get my agreement on anything pertaining my family's well being. If someone else has something I want and don't have, it's going to be one hand washes the other type of dynamic, rather then "let me tell you what to do".
I would expect other families to be just the same: not to take any directions from anyone with regards to their well being, unless a mutual agreement is reached. IMO, that's how things will turn out, those who will be prepared are not the shipple ones, by definition.
I don't think they'll be looking for a leader to save or lead them, that's why they were being busy prepping, rather then watching TV and spending their disposable income on useless toys.

Exactly. The idea that you must have a "leader" is just a residue of your conditioning.

You and I can easily come to an amicable agreement in regards to anything.

No need for some douchebag giving us orders.

 

[browniee]

We buy health, car, house, life, and any other kind of insurance. why not prep. it's life.

 

[mark056]

Exactly. The idea that you must have a "leader" is just a residue of your conditioning. You and I can easily come to an amicable agreement in regards to anything. No need for some douchebag giving us orders.

You haven't studied history, have you? We used to have a banned dude named Hltonizer who was a Minianarchist whatever the F that was, and people would just band together and work cooperatively. Ya know there was another fella that had a similar idea. He claimed people could do that under a system. Called it communism, his name was Karl Marx. People working cooperatively together. Sometime, mosey out to Harvard, Mass and check out Bronson Alcott's (Louisa May's brother as I recall) little experiment. Trouble is unless you live in small groups in extended families (think clans or tribes and they have chiefs or headmen) it just doesn't work that way. You and Mr. Gold need to study some history, anthropology, and sociology. Homo sapiens just don't work that way, we are not wired that way. Sooner or later somebody bigger, badder, meaner and stronger is gonna take over, take your food, take your women and be the big, bad, badass unless you band together with a leader. You are going to have to fight and all combat formations require leadership. Me, I'll just wait until your little utopian cooperative paradise fails as an outlier living on the fringes and take what's left, cuz you boyz ain't gonna survive the cut unless you get real ruthless, real quick...and that's a fact. Like it or not...can't say I do, but most of you have never really been cold, hungry, or had to kill anything to eat. It's not a computer game and it's not romantic. It's going to be brutal, very brutal and you won't be able to trust very many, much less cooperate. You best friends might be willing to kill your kids to take your food, you know the reasonable ones, your fellow preppers, who didn't store enough food or never learned to how hunt properly or prepare game...nope you don't get it grasshoppers..sorry but truly you don't. But WTF, do I know,,,right?

 

[Mudfish]

People crave leadership on some level. You have two choices, lead or be led.

 

[Mr. Gold]

You haven't studied history, have you? We used to have a banned dude named Hltonizer who was a Minianarchist whatever the F that was, and people would just band together and work cooperatively. Ya know there was another fella that had a similar idea. He claimed people could do that under a system. Called it communism, his name was Karl Marx. People working cooperatively together. Sometime, mosey out to Harvard, Mass and check out Bronson Alcott's (Louisa May's brother as I recall) little experiment. Trouble is unless you live in small groups in extended families (think clans or tribes and they have chiefs or headmen) it just doesn't work that way. You and Mr. Gold need to study some history, anthropology, and sociology. Homo sapiens just don't work that way, we are not wired that way. Sooner or later somebody bigger, badder, meaner and stronger is gonna take over, take your food, take your women and be the big, bad, badass unless you band together with a leader. You are going to have to fight and all combat formations require leadership. Me, I'll just wait until your little utopian cooperative paradise fails as an outlier living on the fringes and take what's left, cuz you boyz ain't gonna survive the cut unless you get real ruthless, real quick...and that's a fact. Like it or not...can't say I do, but most of you have never really been cold, hungry, or had to kill anything to eat. It's not a computer game and it's not romantic. It's going to be brutal, very brutal and you won't be able to trust very many, much less cooperate. You best friends might be willing to kill your kids to take your food, you know the reasonable ones, your fellow preppers, who didn't store enough food or never learned to how hunt properly or prepare game...nope you don't get it grasshoppers..sorry but truly you don't. But WTF, do I know,,,right?

Mark056, I sort of knew you were going to use the commie card, so I came prepared

You need to distinguish a group of people from a state or government. History is written by winners, you want to know something about history ? have 3 people give an account of a car accident, you'll probably get three different versions, and now you want us to take history into account as just facts ? common now..
If you want to be led, or to lead, just don't mix with the types of teaser452 or myslef if SHTF, we're probably the type who don't really need to take any orders, or give any orders, I do, however, thrive on cooperation with others, and getting a job done faster and better while helping and getting help. As a human, there's probably no other way to survive for the long run.

I'm not sure if you watched/read BRAVO-Two-Zero (the SAS deployment to Iraq, 1st Golf war), you'll see there, an elite force of soldiers, behave completely differently than what you see in Hollywood movies, no "badassess" no "best" none of that childish stuff that is being fed around here in the U.S, it's not GI Jane.. get what I mean ? Although there is a leader (it is a military unit after all), the lines are along "How about we do ..... does anyone disagree?" rather then "Okay, you do this and you do that, GO!" . When a group of highly capable men (i.e the SAS) runs together, each and everyone is a bonafied badass, all the badass nonsense is just left aside, there's no point to it.

Same would be with preppers, I believe. They are all there to survive and move on, they won't be waiting for anyone's orders about how to rations their beans and bullets. Yes, I'm sure that some preppers with basements full of food will shrink and cower if SHTF happens bigtime, but I'm referring to the general status of preppers, and what's more likely to happen than not.

While most human beings see the reason for leaders as must, I think you'll agree that most humans are also dumb as a doorknob, so, you want me to follow most humans' advice ?

IMO, and it's only my opinion, preppers are NOT the ones who want to be led, or lead, they are stocking up exactlly for that reason, so when SHTF they want no part of the general fiasco that's going to go down. And someone wants to show up on their doorstop and lead ? I say to them, wear a ceramic vest if you do.

If /when preppers will need to join forces it will on a mutual agreement ground, not leadership ground. In a massive SHTF scenario, when actual fighting needs to be done, most likely there will be a leader, and it's going to be the one that says (or pretends) to have military experience, but then, his military experience might be all made up, or can be summed by pushing papers from one stack to another, or failing to make sure no one from his fellow fighters is about to cross 5' from his muzzle before he shuts his weak eye and commits the other one to a scope that only "sees" 350' downfield.
do you think your family will gamble on your life with that morons' decisions ? would you let your son follow someone like that ? I won't.

But, fighting in a battlefield is one thing, and deciding who gets the eggs on Monday and who gets the milk on Thursday in a whole different story, no prepper will be "lead" on that matter, only way it's going to be is by mutual agreement.

 

[Tracer1951]

reality sets in

All that was missing was the gun play.....

 

[Tracer1951]

Unfortunately you are quite right.... we will eventually evolve in to bands or tribes of people protecting our territory as the Native Indians once did.
Safety in numbers, fighting over limited resources, defending what you have, fighting for what you need to survive.

 

[Mr. Gold]

Unfortunately you are quite right.... we will eventually evolve in to bands or tribes of people protecting our territory as the Native Indians once did.
Safety in numbers, fighting over limited resources, defending what you have, fighting for what you need to survive.

And there's nothing really wrong with that. Well, besides the fighting of course. But, it's not like there's no fighting today, on the contrary.
There's actually a better chance for peace and quiet when the groups are small, and everybody knows each other, rather then a military general sending troops he never met to certain death in order to achieve victory only to serve as a bargaining card for politicians, who never met the General nor the troops being sent to their death.

If anything ever really happens, it's going to bring back the single most important fact into a painfully bright light:
The most important thing in human existence if : Family. In the past 120 years there has been a constant erosion in the importance of being loyal to your family. I stand in the opinion that 99.99% of all the sick events in society we hear/see, are going on due to the systematic destruction of the human family.

Children are taught to "Be what they want to be" , "always follow your dreams", "you are the only one that matters", "don't have any kids of your own, there are enough humans on this earth" and so on. Some significant percentage of western countries citizens actually got hooked up and fooled by the garbage that has been pumped into their brain (worry not, the ones pumping the garbage are reproducing just fine), to the point they are un-breeding themselves into oblivion.
If S will ever HTF, the clear truth will emerge, there's nothing more important then family close by (the son who took the job 3000 miles away and the daughter who went to college 2000 miles away are useless), both for well being and survival.

 

[rudiewhitebwoy]

I hear that " I'm coming to your house when the SHTF " every now and again. I respond with " That's great, could you water my wife's plants because we won't be there ".

The post on survivalblog.com today addresses this issue.

Good Read Survival Blog; Your Friends, by DD