Thursday Humor

[Lynne]

I give the guy a lot of credit!! At least he tried! [lol]

> To Be 6 Again
>
> A man was sitting on the edge of the bed, observing his wife turning
> back and forth, looking at herself in the mirror.
>
> Since her birthday was not far off he asked what she'd like to have for
> her Birthday.
>
> I'd like to be six again, she replied, still looking in the mirror.
>
> On the morning of her Birthday, he arose early, made her a nice big bowl
> of Lucky Charms, and then took her to Six Flags theme park.
>
> What a day ! He put her on every ride in the park; the Death Slide,the
> Wall of Fear, the Screaming Monster Roller Coaster, everything there was.
> Five hours later they staggered out of the theme park. Her head was reeling
> and her stomach felt upside down.
>
> He then took her to a McDonald's where he ordered her a Happy Meal with
> extra fries and a chocolate shake.
>
> Then it was off to a movie, popcorn, a soda pop, and her favorite candy,
> M&M's. What a fabulous adventure! Finally she wobbled home with her
> husband and collapsed into bed exhausted.
>
> He leaned over his wife with a big smile and lovingly asked, Well Dear,
> what was it like being six again??
>
> Her eyes slowly opened and her expression suddenly changed.
>
> I meant my dress size, you dumb bunny!
>
> The moral of the story: Even when a man is listening, he is going to get
> it wrong.

 

[Nickle]

Yes, we do!

 

[C-pher]

Now that's funny.

 

[Cptn5spd]

We may get it wrong, but at least we try

 

[KMaurer]

Huh? What'd you say?

Ken

 

[MrsWildweasel]

That's funny, and at least we give you guys credit for trying. [lol]

 

[dwarven1]

[snip] took her to Six Flags theme park.
>
> What a day ! He put her on every ride in the park; the Death Slide,the
> Wall of Fear, the Screaming Monster Roller Coaster, everything there was.
> Five hours later they staggered out of the theme park. Her head was reeling
> and her stomach felt upside down.
>
> He then took her to a McDonald's where he ordered her a Happy Meal with
> extra fries and a chocolate shake.
>
> Then it was off to a movie, popcorn, a soda pop, and her favorite candy,
> M&M's. What a fabulous adventure! Finally she wobbled home with her
> husband and collapsed into bed exhausted.

I don't get it... Except for the Lucky Charms and the Happy Meal, sounds like a typical weekend with Kathy for me...

Oh, yeah, and she prefers Dots to M&M's if she has her choice.

Ross

 

[MrsWildweasel]

Reeses peanut butter cups for me thank you. Unless there is some really good black licorice around. [lol]

 

[Adam_MA]

Reeses peanut butter cups for me thank you. Unless there is some really good black licorice around. [lol]

Mmmmm a woman after my own taste buds! I love em' both!

Adam

 

[Adam_MA]

DELETED: Damn double posts

 

[MrsWildweasel]

I'm glad to hear I'm not the only one. My family thinks I'm weird. [lol]

 

[Adam_MA]

I'm glad to hear I'm not the only one. My family thinks I'm weird. [lol]

Oh god... I LOVE peanut butter... Yesterday I brought 2 PB&F sandwiches for lunch.. Today it was 2 PB&J. My grandfather ALWAYS had black licorice beside his chair. None of the other grand kids liked it, but me and grandpa ALWAYS had our fix!


Adam

 

[Nickle]

Only one? Hell, I was going to post about it being scary!

The wife likes Reese's and black licorice. Amaretto too.

OBTW, nothing in my family is ever though of as weird anymore. There's just some really strange and unusual things. Like "a little old lady", in her early 80's, that owns a Glock 22.

 

[Lynne]

Like "a little old lady", in her early 80's, that owns a Glock 22.

Now THAT'S a woman after my own heart!! [lol]

 

[dwarven1]

Reeses peanut butter cups for me thank you. Unless there is some really good black licorice around. [lol]

Have you tried the licorice Altoids? Talk about powerful! Wow!

Ross

 

[MrsWildweasel]

Nope not yet, I usually try anything I find.

 

[dwarven1]

Well, if you haven't found them by the Octoberfest, let me know and I'll bring a box out for you to try.

Ross

 

[MrsWildweasel]

Sounds good. I'll be looking when i go shopping this weekend. [lol]

 

[Nickle]

Like "a little old lady", in her early 80's, that owns a Glock 22.

Now THAT'S a woman after my own heart!! [lol]

That's my MOM (step-mother, but she raised me, not my mother).

 

[Lynne]

For the self employed among us....I'm sure you can identify.


The Half Wit

A man owned a small farm in Iowa. The Iowa Wage and Hour Department claimed he was not paying proper wages to his help and sent an agent out to interview him.

"I need a list of your employees and how much you pay them," demanded the agent.

"Well, there are my hired hands. One has been with me for four years; the other for three. I pay them each $600 a week, plus free room and board. The cook has been here for 18 months, and I pay her $500 a month plus free room and board. Then there's the half-wit that works here about 18 hours a day He takes home $10 a week and I buy him a bottle of bourbon every week," replied the farmer.

"That's the guy I want to talk to, the half-wit," said the agent.

The farmer said, "That would be me."

 

[Nickle]

Hey, I resemble that remark, when we're talking about Job #3. Except, I get some free ammo.

 

[MrsWildweasel]

Yeah,but I'd take your job. I miss supply! [lol]

 

[Nickle]

Yeah,but I'd take your job. I miss supply! [lol]

I'm referring to Job #3, selling ammo at gun shows, and helping my father with his Gun/Ammo business. You'd probably take it as well. I've spent more than a little money working gun shows, the wife as well (fortunately, since she can't bitch when she's no better than I am).

 

[MrsWildweasel]

You're right I'd do that too. Now can we work something for working vs product in exchange????? [lol]

 

[Chris]

Heard a report yesterday on the radio about an Ostridge farmer somewhere out west that was closing up shop. The reason? Anti-meat group bought neighboring property and encourages ballonists to fire up their balloons there. The propane fired heaters emit a frequency that drive the birds crazy. One recent event caused several thousand feet of fence to be trampled and nearly 50% of his stock to die or have to be put down due to serious injury. When taken to court, the court sides with the "recreational uses" of the neighboring property.

Can't find a link - damn radio news... (^_^)

 

[Admin]

Heard a report yesterday on the radio about an Ostridge farmer somewhere out west that was closing up shop. The reason? Anti-meat group bought neighboring property and encourages ballonists to fire up their balloons there. The propane fired heaters emit a frequency that drive the birds crazy. One recent event caused several thousand feet of fence to be trampled and nearly 50% of his stock to die or have to be put down due to serious injury. When taken to court, the court sides with the "recreational uses" of the neighboring property.

Can't find a link - damn radio news... (^_^)

What a joke.

 

[Lynne]

Heard a report yesterday on the radio about an Ostridge farmer somewhere out west that was closing up shop. The reason? Anti-meat group bought neighboring property and encourages ballonists to fire up their balloons there. The propane fired heaters emit a frequency that drive the birds crazy. One recent event caused several thousand feet of fence to be trampled and nearly 50% of his stock to die or have to be put down due to serious injury. When taken to court, the court sides with the "recreational uses" of the neighboring property.

Can't find a link - damn radio news... (^_^)

Where's PETA when you REALLY need them?

 

[MrsWildweasel]

At least here,the townies would side with the farmers and run the idiots out of town. As some here tried to put our farmers out of business. Was a fun town meeting and we even made them cry... [twisted] Friggin do gooders.

 

[dwarven1]

Can't find a link - damn radio news... (^_^)

http://kvoa.com/Global/story.asp?S=3706086&nav=HMO6dGQB
And here: http://www.dailystar.com/dailystar/allheadlines/88087.php

I saw this on Yahoo yesterday...

Ross

 

[Lynne]

That is really sad. To be hit with something like that at 66. The jurors felt that the ballonists were responsible, but they didn't do anything wrong.... Well. what do you expect from a judicial system that awards stupid people for putting hot coffee between their legs. [roll]