The List of Offensive Shooting Range Stereotypes

You do your thing and I'll do mine. Seems like most of you need to pay more attention to your targets and less attention to the guy next to you.

I think you've got it all wrong. This is about poking fun at OURSELVES.

Who do you think I was describing when I wrote about the IDPA snob? (exaggerated for comedic effect, like all of these).

It's essential to be able to laugh at YOURSELF.

Don
 
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12. The IPSC Weiner

Engages in “realistic” combat shooting scenarios such as being seated on a toilet while wearing a holstered handgun, and suddenly having to dispatch two armed terrorists who broke into his bathroom.

Please, we don't holster our guns on the can, they would fall out

[video=vimeo;9828492]http://vimeo.com/9828492[/video]
 
Hey Man! you left me out of the list.
The "gun snob expert A-hole Tye"
I am at least 30 to 40 pounds over weight and drive a giant GMC Yukon just to haul my ass around.
I carry a fairly basic and plain range bag but it has more ammo in it than you could buy in a calender year.
I have usually bought fired and sold more guns in a month than you will see in 2 years.
If it is new or on a magazine cover I already had it and will tell you it sucks.
I shoot very well for a slow fire guy and seem to know about every gun ever made.
when you can't quite get the feel for your gun and make the mistake of asking me to try it because you think it is off.
I quickly grab it up and fire one round left handed into the bulls eye or damn close, then hand it back to you and say "it's not the gun"(PS I am not left handed)
Yup that is it folks and that is me to a T LOL LOL LOL
 
How about the urban sophisticate friend who had no experience with guns.

He's a subvariant of the guest. You bring him to show him how you "country folk" live.
The difference between him and the hippie is that he comes well dressed and once he actually fires the gun has a huge grin on his face.
If he's honest he will say something like. "Woo hoo, hey give me another clip"

If you let him, he'll burn through all your ammo.
He is intensely interested in proficiency, since he's been an overachiever all his life. So he wants you to review his stance, grip, trigger, trigger squeeze and NPOA.

If you have a machine gun, he will piss himself and giggle like a 12 yr old girl at how much fun he is having.

By the end of the day he's shooting OK, but wishes he could be as good as the man in tac-black and the IPSC weiner

Finally, while leaving, he'll say something like "How quickly can I get a license in this state so that I can have some guns of my own to do this whenever I want to".

Don

Sorry Don, I had to edit your description a bit. Now it fits me almost to a T. Guilty as charged on burning through all my friend's ammo on the first range trip too. To his credit, he wouldn't let me pay for some replacement or even buy him dinner after, though I did offer both.

In my few visits to the range in the short time of having my own gun, I've seen 5, 8, and 9 along with a mild version of 7. Hope to not meet the rest any time soon.
 
You forgot the "Range Rat" who's picking up your brass on the first bounce......before even asking if you are going to collect it yourself to reload. Hanson has at least one such dickhead.
 
Then there is the one that hopefully describes most of us, Goes to the range to enjoy his /her favorite sport, usually runs into someone they know, may meet a new person, indulges in a conversation, ends up letting them try your gun and you try theirs. overall usual fun time, and you end up spending more time there than you planned. another great day. and you don't run into any of the 1-14 croud. I have seen most of them, at one time or another. Great post by the way.

Plus 100
This is exactly what it is all about, great answer
 
Then there is the one that hopefully describes most of us, Goes to the range to enjoy his /her favorite sport, usually runs into someone they know, may meet a new person, indulges in a conversation, ends up letting them try your gun and you try theirs. overall usual fun time, and you end up spending more time there than you planned. another great day. and you don't run into any of the 1-14 croud. I have seen most of them, at one time or another. Great post by the way.


Well said.
 
You forgot the "Range Rat" who's picking up your brass on the first bounce......before even asking if you are going to collect it yourself to reload. Hanson has at least one such dickhead.

This ancient animal is commonly known as the Brassasaurus. They will on occasion stand near the firing line but generally like to lurk in the shadows with the tell tale bucket and rake.
 
You forgot the "Range Rat" who's picking up your brass on the first bounce......before even asking if you are going to collect it yourself to reload. Hanson has at least one such dickhead.

I told a guy there recently to stop picking up my brass, that I reload. He mumbled something about
being glad to meet someone that reloads and he left rather quickly.
 
You are missing

The Range Creep...the guy who looks like he just ventured out of Moms basement for the first since last fall,keeps eyeballing you and long stares at your wife.

The 500+ questions guy...you are the lucky one when you and him happen to be the only ones there and he has only you to talk to.

The Busybody....hovers around you keeping his distance but a vigilant eye at what you are doing,to shy to say anything interesting but seems to enjoy picking up trash around you and the occasional weed....usually vanishes when you stop and ask him what's up.
 
The list didn't include the older guy with the pipe who shows up every spring after wintering in Hawaii and offers to let you shoot his Webley and tells interesting stories about shooting with Tom Selleck at his other club and setting up bomb squads.
 
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The Range Creep...the guy who looks like he just ventured out of Moms basement for the first since last fall,keeps eyeballing you and long stares at your wife.

2370d1286115495t-sling-blade-sling-blade.jpg
 
At every range, shooters from the following list of archetypes can be found. The more you think about it, the more you will realize you have seen these people. The question is, which one are you?


11. The Guest

The Guest, as the title implies, is not actually a member of the range, and does not own any guns. They’re just somebody who got invited to come along by one of the other archetypes. Guests will generally just stand quietly and not touch anything until invited to do so, but some are prone to know-it-all-ism, and have the bad habit of thinking they actually have some sort of skills with firearms based on their extensive combined CounterStrike experience and collection of action movies. The quiet guest will gamely try anything he is handed, so the temptation to hand him the hardest kicking rifle you own and then tell him to put his eye “right up on the scope” must be avoided. Initially leery of firearms, the guest will usually quickly overcome their fears, make the obligatory “it doesn’t sound like that on TV” comments, and settle into some good supervised fun. The obnoxious guest will immediately make his way to the rifle rack, select the most visually impressive weapon, assure onlookers that he requires no help, and then spend 10 minutes trying to figure out how to chamber a round. Quiet guests may become a regular fixture and eventually become shooters themselves. Obnoxious ones are seldom invited back.

I found this on a stumbleupon page and thought NES would find it funny.

What's wrong with CounterStrike huh!? [smile]
 
Sorry Don, I had to edit your description a bit. Now it fits me almost to a T. Guilty as charged on burning through all my friend's ammo on the first range trip too. To his credit, he wouldn't let me pay for some replacement or even buy him dinner after, though I did offer both.

In my few visits to the range in the short time of having my own gun, I've seen 5, 8, and 9 along with a mild version of 7. Hope to not meet the rest any time soon.

The urban sophisticate is patterned after my brother in law. He's a media executive and closet Republican. We got him his first gun this past month, a Glock 17. He can't keep it at his appt on the upper west side of NY, but can possess it at his weekend residence in CT. When he got his CT pistol permit he reminded me of how I was when I got my drivers license.
 
I forgot one type.

The bad parent, we spend all our money on shooting type.

This is based on a couple I've sold some guns to.

They spend about a mortgage payments worth of cash on guns and ammo each month.
I have no idea if they are any good at shooting. They drive old, poorly maintained unreliable cars. Actually they only have one car, so if he drives to work, she is home with the kids without a car. Actually its a big jacked up full sized 4x4 pickup truck that probably gets 10 mpg.

The kids appear to be wearing clothes from goodwill. The shoes are worn out, the jackets inappropriate for the cold weather. Hmm.

Thankfully, I've only seen the his once.
Oh yeah, did I mention the bounced check . . . (shame on me for taking it in the first place)
 
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