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Some good Aviation jokes
- Thread starter Weerd Beard
- Start date
Seen it before,but still good. My brother worked for Boeing,but now works as a Boeing contractot on military installations. He tells me good ones all the time. [lol]
Oh, the Brits have no sense of humor with the germans. When we were stationed in Berlin at the time with the wall up,they truly defined Occupying. 
In the late 60's, a fancy American women's garden club decided to ask a British veteran of the Battle for Britain to come and speak about World War II.
The club president introduced him to the group;
"Ladies, this is Wing Commander Brown. He was a leading British ace in the Battle for Britain and is here to tell us about some of his experiences during the war."
Well, the Wing Commander launches into his talk and is soon relating stories about his flying and the things that happened to him.
"One day ladies me wingman and I were flying at 7,000 meters when all of a sudden these three Germans jumped us. Well, I turned into them and was able to shoot one of these Fokkers down, but then these other two Fokkers got on my tail and kept firing at me. I tried every trick I knew but these Fokkers just kept on me and kept firing so I called to my wingman to help me get these Fokkers."
Noticing that some of the women were turning slightly red with embarassment, the club president spoke up and said:
"Ladies, in WWII Fokker was one of the manufacturers of airplanes for the Germans."
The Wing Commander looks at her and says:
"Ma'am you are correct. But these Fokkers was Messerschmidts!"
The club president introduced him to the group;
"Ladies, this is Wing Commander Brown. He was a leading British ace in the Battle for Britain and is here to tell us about some of his experiences during the war."
Well, the Wing Commander launches into his talk and is soon relating stories about his flying and the things that happened to him.
"One day ladies me wingman and I were flying at 7,000 meters when all of a sudden these three Germans jumped us. Well, I turned into them and was able to shoot one of these Fokkers down, but then these other two Fokkers got on my tail and kept firing at me. I tried every trick I knew but these Fokkers just kept on me and kept firing so I called to my wingman to help me get these Fokkers."
Noticing that some of the women were turning slightly red with embarassment, the club president spoke up and said:
"Ladies, in WWII Fokker was one of the manufacturers of airplanes for the Germans."
The Wing Commander looks at her and says:
"Ma'am you are correct. But these Fokkers was Messerschmidts!"
"The pilot was sitting in his seat and pulled out a .38 revolver. He placed it on top of the instrument panel, and then asked the navigator, “Do you know what I use this for?”
The navigator replied timidly, “No, what’s it for?”
The pilot responded, “I use this on navigators who get me lost!”
The navigator proceeded to pull out a .45 and place it on his chart table.
The pilot asked, “What’s that for?”
“To be honest sir,” the navigator replied, “I’ll know we’re lost before you will.”
Is my favorite sofar!
Arrr
-Weer'd Beard
The navigator replied timidly, “No, what’s it for?”
The pilot responded, “I use this on navigators who get me lost!”
The navigator proceeded to pull out a .45 and place it on his chart table.
The pilot asked, “What’s that for?”
“To be honest sir,” the navigator replied, “I’ll know we’re lost before you will.”
Is my favorite sofar!
Arrr
-Weer'd Beard
Atlanta Airport was at the height of operations one hot summer day when two airplanes arrived at an intersecting taxiway ready for departure.
"Atlanta Tower, Delta 62 is ready for take-off."
Followed immediately by:
"Atlanta Tower, Eastern 332 is ready for take-off."
The tower replied, "Which of you guys is first?"
Without a moment's hesitation the Delta pilot keys his mike and says:
"Tower, this is Eastern 332, go ahead and let Delta go first."
"Atlanta Tower, Delta 62 is ready for take-off."
Followed immediately by:
"Atlanta Tower, Eastern 332 is ready for take-off."
The tower replied, "Which of you guys is first?"
Without a moment's hesitation the Delta pilot keys his mike and says:
"Tower, this is Eastern 332, go ahead and let Delta go first."
