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"Safe" Gun Options for Children in the Home

apothecary123 said:
I work overnights (the holiday scheduale has messed up my sleep) so it takes me awhile to reply.

I am located in Central Massachusetts.

Currently I have all my guns legally secured in locked gunvaults (the nothing special ones you get at the gun store).

Getting rid of her is not an option obviously. She can't stand illegal aliens. She comes from a family that wasn't raised around guns.

I offered to bring all my guns over to a relatives house to be secured and out of the house. She actually got pretty annoyed with me. She basically said if and when a baby arrives that she wants the guns stored in a better safe. Preferably a quick action safe. She doesn't want me to give up my guns.

The 3913 slide is simply too heavy for her to pull back at times. The 442 revolver will be used for now. I am leading towards a M&P 9 mm. I want something that I can mount a light on. Is the Mass Trigger that bad on the M&P? I heard never get a trigger job on an a handgun you plan on using for self defense for legal reasons.

My plan is to.

1. In the spring take her to the range to try multiple guns and to do fun things like shoot at soda bottles like hicok45 does on you tube. More education is needed instead of me saying here is a gun.

2. Involve a women who likes guns maybe she can take a home safety class.

3. She says as long as I get a mega idiot kid proof safe. I can keep the guns.

4. I can continue to carry.

5. Retire the 3913 as a home defense gun and use it as a Range gun. I with I could find a 3953 (the DAO version of it). The decocker/safety is a pain in the ass when carrying. Plus holster options aren't as common.
Click to expand...

Don't wait until the Spring.

Any safe is kid proof if you lock it and don't tell them the combo.

If you go 'quick action', don't give the kids the combo there either.

A locked gun has never hurt a child.

If my fiancee told me I was 'allowed' to carry, it would set off a warning bell with me. Just sayin'. My wife (and daughter) will tap my strong side to make SURE I'm carrying.

This answer doesn't look as bad as the first post, but it's bad enough.

Be sure if it comes down to a choice between the guns or the fiancee'/wife/kids where your decision would lie, and make sure SHE knows it too.

As an FYI< my son started shooting at an Appleseed at age 7. Given their instructions from the RSO and here at home, There's no set of circumstances where they would go near the safes, much less in them.
 
I have a 3913 as my HD handgun ... My wife doesn't like shooting it either ... Works out for me ! Its always nearby .. Everything else is in the safe
 
Modern gun safes are secure and can provide a variety of quick access methods for those who you authorize.

My,9,6,&3 yr old children have seen and fired guns, know the four fundamentals, and understand they are tools and I don't allow play which trivializes gun violence as the movies depict it. If you are responsible enough to have kids and guns separately, you are responsible enough to have them together.


Sent from my SCH-I510 using Tapatalk 2
 
My wife doesn't like guns either, but she knows that I'm a responsible enough person to keep them safely out of reach of our four year old. Get a better safe if that'll keep the peace and get the M&P9 if you like it, just get an Apex trigger kit for it. It amazes me how quick people are on here to end everyone's relationships[laugh]
 
apothecary123 said:
1. I heard never get a trigger job on an a handgun you plan on using for self defense for legal reasons.

2.Retire the 3913 as a home defense gun and use it as a Range gun. I with I could find a 3953 (the DAO version of it). The decocker/safety is a pain in the ass when carrying. Plus holster options aren't as common.
Click to expand...


#1. NOT TRUE!!!

#2. The 3913 is a very underrated and great carry piece. Why are you worried about the decocker/trigger disconnect?? I never use mine unless I have to "decock". It's double action on the first pull, just like a revolver (no safety). When carried it is hammer down, decocker disengaged (off). It's a long double action pull for the first shot. Again, just like a revolver.
 
Billsail said:
#1. NOT TRUE!!!

#2. The 3913 is a very underrated and great carry piece. Why are you worried about the decocker/trigger disconnect?? I never use mine unless I have to "decock". It's double action on the first pull, just like a revolver (no safety). When carried it is hammer down, decocker disengaged (off). It's a long double action pull for the first shot. Again, just like a revolver.
Click to expand...

I use mine in the same way. I only have the decocker/safety on when the gun is in the safe or I am at the range and have fired a few rounds and have to reholster.

It just digs into my side when I carry the 3913 (fixed this by getting a better holster), I carry it with the safety/decocker off. My grandfather is a retired leo. One day he comes over the house with a new "silver" looking gun maybe around 1990. It was a 6906. My brother has that 6906 now and it has no MIM parts. I prefer my j frame for concealed carry.

My grandfather now carries a j frame .38 its easier.
 
You will not compromise on the safety of your family. Not only will you be able to protect your family with your weapons but you will be able to protect your family from your weapons, too. Tell her that since she knows Jack shit about the subject you will be the one to decide which weapon is appropriate for your situation.
 
If you have your guns in a safe, it shouldn't matter how many you have - the kids won't be able to access them.

If you're someone who likes to carry concealed as a single guy, it seems weird that you'd be willing to give that up now - you're about to land yourself a family, wouldn't you like to be able to feel you can protect them should the need arise?

It at least sounds like she might be willing to compromise. There's a big difference between a partner who doesn't like guns and one who wants to control you. So, since she seems ok about at least keeping a shotgun, there may still be hope to help her understand that firearms kept and used safely by responsible owners, are, well, safe.

If you do hit a brick wall, however, and she won't accept your logic, then I'm with some of the folk who've posted here - you'd do well to reconsider marrying someone like this. Because once you get rid of your collection, there'll probably be something else you have to stop doing. And once you stop that, you'll have some other hoop to jump through. I'd hate to see you seeking therapy on this thread at some point:

http://www.northeastshooters.com/vbulletin/threads/233550-SH*T-your-wife-or-significant-other-does

Just tell her you're her man, and you want to be able to take care of business and protect her and your kids if necessary. If any woman doesn't go weak at the knees hearing that, she's not looking for a real man. Trust me, I'm a woman. At least I was last time I looked.
 
If it were me, at my current age and small level of wisdom, I would put my foot down. I would ask her to attend a female centered class. I would overspend on a safe and pay a moving company to move it in for me, because if it's heavy it must be awesome right? /wink. Any small resentment can grow into deep shit when you are married. Add stress of kids and it can ruin a whole family. Find better things to resent each other on, there will be plenty. I would lock my guns up and not tell her, wait it out until we had kids and see if I could make progress, but if I was hitting the dating scene again, I would not marry any woman who gave me an ultimatum like that.

The younger me may have gone through with it and given up my guns, if it were the right girl. The older me, no way. I don't even know if I could get past a date or two with an anti or a neutral.
 
Tell your fiance you will buy a ****ing gun safe. if that is not enough tell her to hit the road because she's a total asshat moonbat and move on.
 
apothecary123 said:
I work overnights (the holiday scheduale has messed up my sleep) so it takes me awhile to reply.

I am located in Central Massachusetts.

Currently I have all my guns legally secured in locked gunvaults (the nothing special ones you get at the gun store).

Getting rid of her is not an option obviously. She can't stand illegal aliens. She comes from a family that wasn't raised around guns.

I offered to bring all my guns over to a relatives house to be secured and out of the house. She actually got pretty annoyed with me. She basically said if and when a baby arrives that she wants the guns stored in a better safe. Preferably a quick action safe. She doesn't want me to give up my guns.

The 3913 slide is simply too heavy for her to pull back at times. The 442 revolver will be used for now. I am leading towards a M&P 9 mm. I want something that I can mount a light on. Is the Mass Trigger that bad on the M&P? I heard never get a trigger job on an a handgun you plan on using for self defense for legal reasons.

My plan is to.

1. In the spring take her to the range to try multiple guns and to do fun things like shoot at soda bottles like hicok45 does on you tube. More education is needed instead of me saying here is a gun.

2. Involve a women who likes guns maybe she can take a home safety class.

3. She says as long as I get a mega idiot kid proof safe. I can keep the guns.

4. I can continue to carry.

5. Retire the 3913 as a home defense gun and use it as a Range gun. I with I could find a 3953 (the DAO version of it). The decocker/safety is a pain in the ass when carrying. Plus holster options aren't as common.
Click to expand...

What does the text in red have to do with anything
 
Delta L Varmint said:
My wife doesn't like guns either, but she knows that I'm a responsible enough person to keep them safely out of reach of our four year old. Get a better safe if that'll keep the peace and get the M&P9 if you like it, just get an Apex trigger kit for it. It amazes me how quick people are on here to end everyone's relationships[laugh]
Click to expand...

It's a very telling sign and life is too short.
 
This thread is sad. Doesn't make nes look good at all. Simply telling the OP to man up a little and put his foot down probably would have been sufficient. Instead we get suggestions to have his balls cut off, call his fiancee a bitch and moonbat, and idiot. Nice

Sorry to the OP. hope it all works out for you. Pm me and I'll give you info on an ex atf agent who specializes in women's firearms training. Maybe he can get your girl a little more comfortable with guns.
 
BattleSnail said:
This thread is sad. Doesn't make nes look good at all. Simply telling the OP to man up a little and put his foot down probably would have been sufficient. Instead we get suggestions to have his balls cut off, call his fiancee a bitch and moonbat, and idiot. Nice

Sorry to the OP. hope it all works out for you. Pm me and I'll give you info on an ex atf agent who specializes in women's firearms training. Maybe he can get your girl a little more comfortable with guns.
Click to expand...

My wife said she's a bitch and a moonbat. People like you make NES look bad.
 
cyberlogicx said:
My wife said she's a bitch and a moonbat. People like you make NES look bad.
Click to expand...


I think the thread was highly informative and entertaining. One would hope that the OP has the ability to decipher the serious from the tongue and cheeky. The Op is being offered the opportunity to learn how to avoid the same stumbling blocks that hurt those who have gone before him. [laugh]
 
Foot down definitely gets you what you want. It worked with who is now my wife, and I quite literally told her dad to F off on the issue. I get along with him just fine now.
 
My wife is anti. She won't entertain the idea of going to the range. She does not want guns in the house with kids. After a 15 minute talk and a show and tell session with her she still has no interest in shooting but understands that when they are locked in the safe they can't load themselves and cause havoc. We have 4 kids. 3 have no idea I have guns and the 4th could care less about them
 
FSTC said:
Send her to the range with a competent female instructor. Let her figure out common sense on her own. If she is "open" to the idea of a gun in the home, she is open minded enough for enlightenment.

Contact Claudia at BeSafe http://www.northeastshooters.com/vbulletin/forums/248-Be-Safe-Firearms-Training
Click to expand...

Claudia is awesome, she taught my girlfriend's ckass:) if you want to have yours spend some time with a female shooter who carries every day, pm me and we'll put them together:) Between Jenn and I we have a few more "female friendly" firearms, both handguns and long guns she can try.
 
Marriage is a compromise that involves give and take. Decisions should be based on rational discussion of factual data/information. Emotional demands that can not be supported are all about control. If you concede to this now, there will be more to follow. Getting a good gun safe is the obvious answer. Do not under any circumstance give her the combination. I am fairly certain if you do, she will promptly bring your guns to your local police department for disposal. I am wondering, why did you even ask the question? When talking against the shotgun in your OP, you state: It would be the ONLY gun I could keep and I could no longer carry concealed (which is fine). No need for an [FONT=Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif]orchiectomy...[sad][/FONT]
soup-nazi.jpg

White Feather
 
I went through the same damn thing 25 years ago. I bought a big safe with lockable dial and later added a hidden cam pointed at the safe. It kept the wife and nosy parents (little Johnny can't come to your house I hear you have guns..) happy. I use similar rifle cases and bring the guns to the range in a bag. In the safe is a note that starts, If you are reading this I'm probably dead, here is a list of the guns and their approximate worth....

This Christmas I said to my wife: I need a new gun safe
Her: Is yours broken?
Me: No it is full

Buy a big safe and make it your life's goal to fill it up
 
rep308 said:
I went through the same damn thing 25 years ago. I bought a big safe with lockable dial and later added a hidden cam pointed at the safe. It kept the wife and nosy parents (little Johnny can't come to your house I hear you have guns..) happy. I use similar rifle cases and bring the guns to the range in a bag. In the safe is a note that starts, If you are reading this I'm probably dead, here is a list of the guns and their approximate worth....

This Christmas I said to my wife: I need a new gun safe
Her: Is yours broken?
Me: No it is full

Buy a big safe and make it your life's goal to fill it up
Click to expand...

Have to say YOU ARE DA MAN [cheers]
 
My wife brought up a good point. If you two are planning on marrying, and this woman is dead set against guns and you wind up 'compromising' now, this will only lead to more 'compromise' in the future. Then, when other things in the marraige wind up not working out and the inevitable divorce happens, she has anti ammunition and she can say "HE LOVES SCARY GUNS" and since you're in MA, good luck ever getting the kids.
 
fencer said:
What it all really boils down to, is how important is gun ownership to you?

I mean you no disrespect and if you are marrying the girl you obviously care about her very much, but if you are willing to allow her to set conditions on your gun ownership, it is very likely that sooner or later you will sell off your collection or only own guns she approves of. Which is cool if it is your choice.

My wife supports me and encouraged me to teach our kids to shoot and about firearms safety. But I knew that before we got married, 23 years ago.

Your future kids are more likely to be hurt by her unlocked windex than your locked guns, but what you do now will dictate the tone of your marriage, which I sincerely hope lasts for 75 years.
Click to expand...

All I can say in this OP debate is she needs to think about the what ifs in a different light. We had a break in recently. Nothing was done about it except a slap on the wrist because it was a first "registered" offense. We are confident this individual has not learned his lesson because he has done this several times but was never charged until he broke into our home. What would your wife do if it was her at home? Load a shotgun and hope she didnt blast through a wall because she couldnt handle it? The advise id suggest for you is to go to a home defnse class that talks about setting up a home safety plan. They will talk about everything from security cameras, where to go if there is a break in and protection. You'd be surprised on what it takes to build a safe environment. Motion lights, cameras, alarms and protection devices.
 
I was married to a woman who made me get rid of my guns. I resented the hell out of her for that, and resented myself for relenting. Then after she stabbed me I understood her strategy and divorced her. Worst ten years of my life. My wife now is pretty liberal but leaves our safety decisions up to me and enjoys shooting.
 

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