Marriage Advice (from the wife)

[cathouse01]

 

[PL-52]

It was told to me diffently. .... Marry a short woman and you always be nuts over her.

 

[one-eyed Jack]

If he is short and marries a tall girl: "When they're nose to nose, his toes is in it. When they're toes to toes, his nose is in it". Jack.

 

[Roof gunner]

If he is short and marries a tall girl: "When they're nose to nose, his toes is in it. When they're toes to toes, his nose is in it". Jack.

Havnt herd that since my father died ! Lol

 

[one-eyed Jack]

Havnt herd that since my father died ! Lol

Right. There's a lot more. If my brain wasn't gone, I'd remember them. Jack.

 

[enbloc]

"Variety"... It's a good thing...

 

[robjax]

makes sense.

 

[Roadglide]

Two of my favorites

Lock your dog and wife in the trunk. Come back 30 minutes later. Open it and see which one is happy to see you.

Dog and wife missing
Reward for dog.

 

[shootymacshootface]

I just like a girl with small hands. Thats really important to me.

 

[appraiser]

"No husband has ever been shot while doing the dishes"

so says the fridge magnet I see every time I go for a snack

 

[rommel]

My best friend ran away with my wife, I sure do miss him

 

[a73elkyss]

My best friend ran away with my wife, I sure do miss him

Now that's funny. Probably more accurate than not.

Jay

 

[Dadstoys]

One of the most beautiful and wild gals I ever dated was 4'10-11".
I mean stunning looking.
She was also crazy as a shit house rat.
I heard she tried to stab the guy she ended up marrying .
Talk about the definition of dodging a bullet.

I married a tall, beautiful and far less crazy one.
Less crazy

 

[citoriguy]

You want to get married? You want a wife? Hell - take mine. No sense in both of us being miserable!

 

[AHM]

Just noticed a fun nuance about my favorite misleading Harbor Freight product photo:
The guys we had add some outlets to our unfinished basement this month
said that the standard height to place those outlet boxes is 48".

 

[one-eyed Jack]

I just like a girl with small hands. Thats really important to me.

Why? Jack.

 

[shootymacshootface]

Why? Jack.

Oh, no reason....

 

[frenchman]

We are married, and we are a solid unit. If you're happy, I'm happy. If you're sad, I'm sad. If you're hungry, I'm hungry. If you want hanky panky , I want hanky panky. If you're upset, I'm upset. If you jump off a cliff, I'm gonna miss you.

 

[556USER]

marry a girl of similar height it is much easier to do 69 without getting a crook in your neck

 

[milktree]

Why? Jack.

Makes your cock look huge.

 

[Fritz the Cat]

The secret to a happy marriage is to take two vacations a year.
Her's is in July. Mine is in September.

 

[a73elkyss]

We are married, and we are a solid unit. If you're happy, I'm happy. If you're sad, I'm sad. If you're hungry, I'm hungry. If you want hanky panky , I want hanky panky. If you're upset, I'm upset. If you jump off a cliff, I'm gonna miss you.

The secret to a happy marriage is to take two vacations a year. Her's is in July. Mine is in September.

You guys are way to funny. This is my new "start my day off with a smile" NES thread.



Sometimes, you just need to start your day without all the negative crap on your shoulders. Thank you.


Jay

 

[fishgutzy]

Ha!
My wife is 5'10" and owns more pistols than I do. The latter is my fault since I keep buying her more guns.

 

[FPrice]

If he is short and marries a tall girl: "When they're nose to nose, his toes is in it. When they're toes to toes, his nose is in it". Jack.

Had to laugh, haven't heard that one in years!

 

[Davidk]

Find a woman who hates you, won’t cook for you and won’t has sex with you, and buy her a house.

It will be just like marriage, only cheaper

 

[Larry Gentile]

I just like a girl with small hands. Thats really important to me.

Made me think of this Scene

View: https://youtu.be/zdUactrcXSg

 

[308rifleman]

I just like a girl with small hands. Thats really important to me.

Never preferred size. Yours truly is 5'10" and a muscular 195 lbs. My Cajun girl wife, Jill, is 5'7" and 135 lbs, with size 9 hands and size 9 feet. Her hand size and shoe size mean little to me. My bride has a HUGE heart that is full of love for her family. That's all that really matters. Hard working nurse anesthetist, devoted mother to our 2 little girls, fantastic wife and very proficient with firearms!