Ma**h***s - You know you are a Ma**h*** (from Massachusetts) if:
1. You think crosswalks are for wimps
2. You think if someone is nice to you that they either want
something, or they are from out of town and lost
3. You know how to cross four lanes of traffic in five seconds
4. You're amazed when traveling out of town that people at
McDonalds actually speak English.
5. You think it's not actually tailgating unless you're touching
the bumper of the car in front of you
6. You know that a yellow light means that at least five more
people can get through and a red one means two more can
7. The transportation system is known as the "T"
8. You could own a small town in Iowa for the cost of your house
9. Subway is a fast food place
10. There are 24 Dunkin Donuts shops within 15 minutes of your
house
11. When people talk about "The Curse Of The Bambino", you know
what they're talking about, and believe it, too (well, at least you
USED to)
12. You believe using your turn signals gives away your plan to
the enemy
13. If you stay on the same road long enough, it eventually has
three different names.
14. Someone has honked at you because you didn't peel out the
second the light turned green
15. You have honked at someone because they didn't peel out the
second the light turned green
16. All the potholes just add to the excitement of driving.
17. Stop signs mean slow down a little, but only of you want to.
18. Six inches of snow is considered a dusting.
19. Three days of 90 degree heat is definately a "heat wave" and
63 degrees is "a little on the warm side"
20. You cringe everytime you hear some actor or actress imitate
the "Boston Accent" on TV or in a movie...if you don't have it, then
you're never going to get it, even if you were born here
21. At the ice cream shop, you call chocolate sprinkles
"jimmies".
22. You can go from one side of town to the other in less than
fifteen minutes and see at least fifteen losers you went to high
school with doing the same thing they were doing when you saw them
last
23. The person in front of you is going 70 MPH and you're cursing
them for going too slow
24. You know how to pronounce towns like Worcester, Haverhill, and
Cotuit and Leominster
25. You know what they sell at a "packie"
26. You have never been to the Cheers bar
27. You've slammed on your brakes to deter a tailgater.
28. You still try to order curly fries from Burger King
29. You keep an ice scraper in your car all year round
30. You know at least three Tony's, one Vinnie, and a Frank
31. Paranoia sets in when you can't see an ATM or CVS
32. You've pulled out of a side street and used your car to block
oncoming traffic so you can make a left
33. You've bragged about saving money at The Christmas Tree Shop
34. You know what a "regular coffee" is
35. You can navigate a rotary without a problem
36. You have been to Fenway Park
37. You refer to the New York Yankees as the 'evil empire'
38. You feel the rest of the world needs to drive more like you
39. When someone calls you a "ma**h***", you take it as a
compliment
40. You use the words "wicked" and "good" in the same sentence
41. You know what a frappe is
42. Saint Patrticks Day is your second favorite holiday
43. You are proud to drink Sam Adams and think that the rest of
the country owes Bostonians a thank you
44. You never say "Cape Cod"; you say "the cape"
45. You went to Old Sturbridge Village and Plymouth Plantation in
elementary school
46. You can drive to the mountains and the ocean all in one day
47. You have a special place in your heart for the Worcester
Firefighters
48. You know the Mass Pike is some strange weather dividing line
49. You almost feel disappointed when someone doesn't flip you
off when you cut them off or steal their parking space
50. You go into the right lane to pass traffic on the highway
51. As soon as the light turns green, you need to take that left turn before the cars coming in the opposite direction begin moving
52. You actually get all of these jokes
1. You think crosswalks are for wimps
2. You think if someone is nice to you that they either want
something, or they are from out of town and lost
3. You know how to cross four lanes of traffic in five seconds
4. You're amazed when traveling out of town that people at
McDonalds actually speak English.
5. You think it's not actually tailgating unless you're touching
the bumper of the car in front of you
6. You know that a yellow light means that at least five more
people can get through and a red one means two more can
7. The transportation system is known as the "T"
8. You could own a small town in Iowa for the cost of your house
9. Subway is a fast food place
10. There are 24 Dunkin Donuts shops within 15 minutes of your
house
11. When people talk about "The Curse Of The Bambino", you know
what they're talking about, and believe it, too (well, at least you
USED to)
12. You believe using your turn signals gives away your plan to
the enemy
13. If you stay on the same road long enough, it eventually has
three different names.
14. Someone has honked at you because you didn't peel out the
second the light turned green
15. You have honked at someone because they didn't peel out the
second the light turned green
16. All the potholes just add to the excitement of driving.
17. Stop signs mean slow down a little, but only of you want to.
18. Six inches of snow is considered a dusting.
19. Three days of 90 degree heat is definately a "heat wave" and
63 degrees is "a little on the warm side"
20. You cringe everytime you hear some actor or actress imitate
the "Boston Accent" on TV or in a movie...if you don't have it, then
you're never going to get it, even if you were born here
21. At the ice cream shop, you call chocolate sprinkles
"jimmies".
22. You can go from one side of town to the other in less than
fifteen minutes and see at least fifteen losers you went to high
school with doing the same thing they were doing when you saw them
last
23. The person in front of you is going 70 MPH and you're cursing
them for going too slow
24. You know how to pronounce towns like Worcester, Haverhill, and
Cotuit and Leominster
25. You know what they sell at a "packie"
26. You have never been to the Cheers bar
27. You've slammed on your brakes to deter a tailgater.
28. You still try to order curly fries from Burger King
29. You keep an ice scraper in your car all year round
30. You know at least three Tony's, one Vinnie, and a Frank
31. Paranoia sets in when you can't see an ATM or CVS
32. You've pulled out of a side street and used your car to block
oncoming traffic so you can make a left
33. You've bragged about saving money at The Christmas Tree Shop
34. You know what a "regular coffee" is
35. You can navigate a rotary without a problem
36. You have been to Fenway Park
37. You refer to the New York Yankees as the 'evil empire'
38. You feel the rest of the world needs to drive more like you
39. When someone calls you a "ma**h***", you take it as a
compliment
40. You use the words "wicked" and "good" in the same sentence
41. You know what a frappe is
42. Saint Patrticks Day is your second favorite holiday
43. You are proud to drink Sam Adams and think that the rest of
the country owes Bostonians a thank you
44. You never say "Cape Cod"; you say "the cape"
45. You went to Old Sturbridge Village and Plymouth Plantation in
elementary school
46. You can drive to the mountains and the ocean all in one day
47. You have a special place in your heart for the Worcester
Firefighters
48. You know the Mass Pike is some strange weather dividing line
49. You almost feel disappointed when someone doesn't flip you
off when you cut them off or steal their parking space
50. You go into the right lane to pass traffic on the highway
51. As soon as the light turns green, you need to take that left turn before the cars coming in the opposite direction begin moving
52. You actually get all of these jokes
