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I don't know if you can help

G

Grace

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So I know I haven't been on here long but I have come to feel like I know some of you. There's been a tragedy in my family and I am being barraged with well-meaning advice but hoped to turn to some of you for some answers. To air my dirty laundry publicly may not be in the best taste but I am so devoid of feeling at this point I just don't give a shit.

We lost Joe unexpectedly early Friday morning. By his own hand. In my living room. I am lost.

My family did not know the extent of our gun collection and are horrified. I need to know the legality of his guns now as there was no will. We have 7 pairs, half of which are in my name other half his. We were not married but have been together since high school, 12 years.

My brother has his ltc. He is telling me that since the boys and I will need to be in grief counseling it will be best to transfer the guns to him in the interim as there may be things that come out in counseling that could somehow be detrimental to my own ltc.

I also want to know how long it will take to get the gun back from the PD that he used. MSP are giving me no timeline. I want it back so I can sell it.

So I guess I'm asking how do I gain ownership of his, should I transfer them to my brother/is he telling the truth, and does anyone know if I'll ever get the gun back.

Thanks for any info.
 
I'm very sorry to read this.

Since there was no will and you weren't married, MGLs on intestate will come into play here and the best advice I can offer is to consult with an attorney who has a significant practice in estate law and is in your general area. I recommend that you PM OfficerObie59 as he's in your area and has family ties to a law firm in that area . . . he might be able to recommend an appropriate attorney to assist you.

Since you have a LTC, holding onto the guns is not an issue with the legal authorities, so I would not worry about that aspect of things.

My thoughts and prayers go out to you.
 
I'm very sorry to hear of your lost. I'm sorry to hear your mate decided to take his own life. I hope you are able to find support to get through this tragedy.

As for his guns, I would put them into the trust of your family attorney. Obviously I don't have more than what you're sharing here, but if Joe's guns were your brother's first concern, it may be an indicator of his motivations. I don't know the nature of your relationship with your brother, so it is hard to gauge if he is being genuine or not with regard to his concern for you.

IANAL, but if you aren't married, and he is intestate, they're pretty much up for grabs. MA is not a common law marriage state, however, most courts will take your living arrangement into consideration. Remember, possession counts.
Probate can be a messy business, more so when surviving family start acting like scavengers. Been there, (did not enjoy) done that.

My advice, worth what you paid: Hang onto them, get an attorney to assist in the disposition of the estate.

ETA- overlooked you have your LTC. Keep them locked up until estate resolved.
 
So sorry to read this. My sincere condolences.

What Len says in his post looks like good advice as far as the guns go.

Take care and I hope things will get better for you.
 
Damn, very sorry to hear this.

Without a will, I guess there is a risk that one of his blood relatives will try to claim ownership of 'his' property. I don't know the law, but maybe you can claim something like a commonlaw marriage due to the time you were together. I wouldn't think that the police would have any access to anything that happens in your counseling sessions, but maybe I am being naiive.

I wouldn't actually transfer ownership to your brother, but maybe let him store things for you until the dust settles.

Best of luck to you, and I hope you get some solid advice here or elsewhere.
 
I was going to ask about common-law marriage, but Friday answered that. Beyond that, I don't any of the legality. I also think an estate lawyer is a good idea.

In any case, I'm really just chiming in to say that even though we don't know each other at all, I am very sorry for your loss. I can't begin to understand what you're going through.
 
i have no advice, but just wanted to send my condolences to what your going thru...has to be insanely difficult.
 
I am very sorry for your loss. The advice from LenS and Friday seems to make the most sense, but IANAL. God bless you and your family. You're in my prayers.
 
I am terribly sorry for your loss.

Like others have said, not knowing your brother's motives, I'd hold on to them. No laws have been passed (yet) that demand mental health records be available to your chief of police. Lock the guns up and don't give them to anyone until an attorney says otherwise.
 
i am so sorry that i can't contribute more, my condolences for your loss.

it may in fact be best to transfer the guns, or to store them with another licensed individual until everything settles down.
 
My condolences for you and your family for your loss.

It's unfortunate that you will need to have a clear head and have to navigate this awful legal process at this time, but it must be done to ensure you know your rights and no one takes advantage I this awful situation.

I would recommend you talk to an estate attorney ASAP. Colleen Carrol in Plymouth is a sharp, professional, and ferocious advocate. I dont know how much she practices down the Cape, but should she not be able to help you, she could certainly recommend someone who can.

From a law enforcement standpoint as long as the firearm was not used in a crime you should be able to have it returned once whatever investigation has concluded.
 
In terms of legal advice I don't have much to offer, but LenS and OfficerObie59 know their stuff - I would start there.

So sorry to hear about your loss. My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family. I can't even imagine what you must be going through, but I hope things get better as quickly as possible. I wish I could offer more.

Buck.


Sent from Buck's antlers. Yes, they have secret built-in antennas.
 
Words can't express the sympathy I feel for you. I have had to do the clean up three times in my life. Twice for family members and once for a friend. You just can't get that shit out of you head.

Be careful with the grief counseling. Ma may very well use that as an excuse to declare you unsuitable if your CLEO happens to be an anti.

My very best wishes to you and your boys. Let us know if there is anything we can do.
 
What a horrible situation to be in, good luck!

As for transferring anything to the brother, until you agree it's a good idea or a court orders you to do so, I wouldn't do a single thing with the firearms. Especially not your collection.
 
Thank you. Again I'm sorry to dump this all, I have been wallowing but it's time to get my head together. What does IANAL mean?

They are all at my brother's house in his safe right now. I know he means well. I will under no circumstances agree to sell them. The reason we bought in pairs was for the boys to have when they grow up. I got my ltc before Joe did this year, and we sucked up all our fa-10's transferring his half of the guns to his name and had to ffl two of them. I am worried about the counseling bit though. The only real positive connection the boys have had with him in the past few months have been involving the firearms. They wanted to know everything about them and it's something they shared together. I am sure this will come out in whatever counseling we go to. I just have it in my head now that someone will deem me unfit and try to take them or my license.

Thank you for the name of the attorney Mr. Obie. I just looked her up and will be calling her today.
 
I am so very sorry for your loss.


You need to ensure that your property is well protected during any published times for a funeral or wake or the like. At a minimum, be sure to call the PD and ask them to keep an eye on the property.
 
As this may have to go through probate it will be up to the judge, and I have no experience to offer there.

But my thought are these: If "the boys" are his children and he died without a will, it's likely that they have a major interest in his estate. It's likely the precedence is spouse then children then parents then siblings, or some such. But it's really up to the judge and the lawyers if it gets to probate court.

If they are your joint children, then as their mother you can likely be a custodian for their interest in the firearms. Will you have to go through the trouble of an actual trust for the guns because they are (I assume) under 18? I don't know that either, just more questions for you to ask your lawyer.
 
Joe&Grace2A said:
Thank you. Again I'm sorry to dump this all, I have been wallowing but it's time to get my head together. What does IANAL mean?

They are all at my brother's house in his safe right now. I know he means well. I will under no circumstances agree to sell them. The reason we bought in pairs was for the boys to have when they grow up. I got my ltc before Joe did this year, and we sucked up all our fa-10's transferring his half of the guns to his name and had to ffl two of them. I am worried about the counseling bit though. The only real positive connection the boys have had with him in the past few months have been involving the firearms. They wanted to know everything about them and it's something they shared together. I am sure this will come out in whatever counseling we go to. I just have it in my head now that someone will deem me unfit and try to take them or my license.

Thank you for the name of the attorney Mr. Obie. I just looked her up and will be calling her today.
Click to expand...

If you are concerned about losing your LTC, I would ask the counselor up front about confidentiality and under what circumstances it would be breached (in other words, under what circumstances, if any, they would need to share the conseling discussions with an outside party).

Buck.

Sent from Buck's antlers. Yes, they have secret built-in antennas.
 
Last edited:
I can't offer advice and I know that's what you're asking for but I just want to offer you my condolences. I can't imagine what you're going through [sad2]
 
Quiet said:
As this may have to go through probate it will be up to the judge, and I have no experience to offer there.

But my thought are these: If "the boys" are his children and he died without a will, it's likely that they have a major interest in his estate. It's likely the precedence is spouse then children then parents then siblings, or some such. But it's really up to the judge and the lawyers if it gets to probate court.

If they are your joint children, then as their mother you can likely be a custodian for their interest in the firearms. Will you have to go through the trouble of an actual trust for the guns because they are (I assume) under 18? I don't know that either, just more questions for you to ask your lawyer.
Click to expand...




My condolences.

Good tips above. Never thought of the funeral angle, maybe ask the neighbors to keep an eye out too.
Looks like in MA the kids are first in line w/o a will.
Intestate Succession in Massachusetts | Nolo.com
 
My only knowledge dealing with this issue is from Florida where it was a complete non-issue

Counseling should be a private matter so nothing that comes out sould effect your LTC (barring a direct threat)

I am certain one of the dealers here would be able to hold into your collection if need arises without placing ownership at risk
 
I am so sorry to hear about your loss. I myself have lost someone very close to me the same way. I guess my only words of wisdom would be is to talk about it when you are ready to in counseling. I was hesitant at first but it helped a lot.
 

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