Hillbilly Mirror

Pilgrim

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After living in the remote wilderness of Tennessee all his life, an old hillbilly decided it was time to visit the big city.

In one of the stores he picks up a mirror and looks at it. Not ever having seen one before, he remarked at the image staring back at him, "How 'bout that! Here's a picture of my daddy."

He bought the 'picture', but on the way home he remembered his wife didn't like his father, so he hung it in the barn and every morning before leaving for the fields, he would go there and look at it.

His wife began to get suspicious of these many trips to the barn. One day, after her husband left, she searched the barn and found the mirror. As she looked into the glass, she fumed, "So that's the ugly bitch he's runnin' 'round with!"
 

JonJ

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And here's the same joke run through the Redneck Dialectizer:

Af'er livin' in th' remote wilderness of Tennessee all his life, an old hillbilly decided it was time t'viset th' trimenjus city.

In one of th' sto'es he picks up a mirro' an' looks at it. Not evah havin' see one befo'e, he remarked at th' image starin' back at him, "How 'bout thet! Fry mah hide! Hyar's a pitcher of mah Pappy."

He bought th' 'pitcher', but on th' way home he remembered his wife didn't like his Pappy, so he hung it in th' barn an' ev'ry mo'nin' befo'e leavin' fo' th' fields, he'd hoof it thar an' look at it.

His wife began t'git suspicious of these menny trips t'th' barn, as enny fool kin plainly see. One day, af'er her husbin lef', she searched th' barn an' foun' th' mirro'. As she looked into th' glass, she foomd, "So thass th' homely bitch he's runnin' 'roun' wif! Fry mah hide!"
 

FPrice

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After living in the hills of (name your favorite redneck state) all their lives, two brothers in their seventies visited the big city. They walked into a ten-story office building to look around when they came across the elevators. They watched in awe as an old, stooped over woman entered one, the doors closed, and a minute later a young attractive blonde walks out.

"Clem, ya know what I'm thinkin'?"

"Whatch you thinkin' Roy?"

"I'm a-thinkin' thet we shouldst a brung our wives with us."
 
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