Funny Picture and Video of the Day MEGATHREAD!!!

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It's so bad here...

My neighbor got a pre-declined credit card in the mail.

CEO's are now playing miniature golf.

Exxon-Mobil laid off 25 Congressmen.

A stripper was killed when her audience showered her with rolls of pennies while she danced.

If the bank returns your check marked "Insufficient Funds," you call them and ask if they meant you or them.

McDonald's is selling the 1/4 ouncer.

Angelina Jolie adopted a child from America.

Parents in Beverly Hills fired their nannies and learned their children's names.

My cousin had an exorcism but couldn't afford to pay for it, and they re-possessed her!

A truckload of Americans was caught sneaking into Mexico.

A picture is now only worth 200 words.

When Bill and Hillary travel together, they now have to share a room.

The Treasure Island casino in Las Vegas is now managed by Somali pirates.

And, finally...

I was so depressed last night thinking about the Chinese Flu, the economy, wars, jobs, my savings, Social Security, retirement funds, etc., I called the Suicide Hotline. I got a call center in Pakistan, and when I told them I was suicidal, they got all excited, and asked if I could drive a truck or wear a vest.
 

BTSDOG

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A river runs thru it........
A cat like this will be in high demand if we're all still quarantined in October:
View attachment 344087
me thinks ALL cats might be in high demand....🙀🙀
 

JD-1

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So - I haven't posted much as you can tell - but this is what NES has done to me...
On the elliptical this morning listening to my Black Sabbath/Ozzy play list and on comes Ozzy singing "All the Young Dudes". I'm listening and in the chorus I hear "Boogaloo dudes".
Did I hear that right? So I had to look up the lyrics - and sure enough...
"All the young dudes (hey dudes)
"Carry the news (where are you)
"Boogaloo dudes (stand up come on)
"Carry the news
"All the young dudes (I want to hear you)
"Carry the news (I want to see you)
"Boogaloo dudes (and I want to talk to you all of you)
"Carry the news
...well - it made me laugh...
 

Obie1

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So - I haven't posted much as you can tell - but this is what NES has done to me...
On the elliptical this morning listening to my Black Sabbath/Ozzy play list and on comes Ozzy singing "All the Young Dudes". I'm listening and in the chorus I hear "Boogaloo dudes".
Did I hear that right? So I had to look up the lyrics - and sure enough...
"All the young dudes (hey dudes)
"Carry the news (where are you)
"Boogaloo dudes (stand up come on)
"Carry the news
"All the young dudes (I want to hear you)
"Carry the news (I want to see you)
"Boogaloo dudes (and I want to talk to you all of you)
"Carry the news
...well - it made me laugh...
Did you rap all night about your suicide?
 
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