Advice from a cop

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Advice from a Cop

I saw this posted in another place on the web and thought it contained some sage advice and astute observations.

Watch out for the CSI effect. There is no machine that we can drop an eyelash into and come up with the DNA profile, fingerprints, and mug shot of the owner in 2 minutes.

When you see an emergency vehicle behind you with its lights and sirens on: pull to the RIGHT, and Stop. We are usually required to pass cars on the left.

Dunkin' Donuts has much better coffee than they do doughnuts.

When you're driving in the fast lane and you see a cop behind you don't, go 5 mph's under the speed limit. We are not impressed by how safe of a driver you can be, we're trying to go help someone (or catch that guy in the SUV that just cut you off). Safely move over and let us pass by you, please.

If you get a warning instead of a ticket from a motorcycle cop...go buy a lottery ticket, because you've already beaten the odds.

When you see an officer conducting a traffic stop, or with a suspect in handcuffs] it is generally not a good idea to approach him/her and ask for directions. If you do, don't expect the officer to be nice when he/she tells you to get lost, and don't expect the officer to take the time to explain.

If a cop causes a car accident we usually get a ticket, and sometimes we get suspended. When is the last time you got 3 days off [without pay] for
rear-ending a guy at Wal-mart.

If you think you can fan all the pot smoke out of the car before we smell it, good luck.

We know you've had more than 2 beers. I've never had two beers and driven my car through the front doors of a Toys-R-Us, pissed my pants, and passed out with my foot on the gas.

Here's how to get out of a ticket: don't break the law in the first place.

If you drive a piece of junk car; this is why you're getting pulled over. In one week I pulled over 10 cars for minor equipment violations. 8 out of 10 had no vehicle insurance, 7 out of 10 had suspended drivers licenses, 5 out of 10 had warrants, 2 out of 10 had felony warrants, and 1 out of 10 was a known sex offender with his 12 year old niece in the car without her mother's knowledge. Of the 2 out of 10 that didn't have any other violations, one was given a fix-it-ticket and the other was given a warning(and if you are trying to do the math many had multiple violations)

If you've just been pulled over how doing 70 in a 35 Do Not greet the officer with, "What seems to be the problem, officer?"

We get coffee breaks too, and sometimes we run into stores and do some shopping during them.

When you're the victim of a burglary take the time you spend waiting for the officer to find the model #'s and the serial #'s of the stuff that was taken.

Some cops are just jerks, but take heart in the fact that other cops don't like them either.

If it's nighttime and you're driving a vehicle with tinted windows and I pull you over. It's not because of your skin color, I can't tell if the vehicle even
has a driver until the windows are rolled down.

Cops make mistakes, and sometimes they are big mistakes.

Some cops are bad, and sometimes they're real bad.

Every time you hear on the news about people running away from a crazed gunman, someone's son or daughter in a blue uniform is running TOWARD that crazed gunman.

City cops generally don't like the highway patrol, and vice versa.

Yes it's true, cops usually don't give other cops speeding tickets. Think of it as an employee discount, perk or benefit, and unless you're a habitual speeder all you ever get is a fine anyway.

If your local police agency has a helicopter everyone knows it's loud and annoying, but did you know it can cover the same area as 15-20 patrol officers, and safely chase criminals that are driving 90 MPH through
city streets. Many times the guy has no idea it's there and slows down.

Your 5 year old kid getting pushed down by another 5 year old kid IS NOT a police matter,. Talk to the other kid's parents.

If your kid won't do his homework or do his chores,911 is not the answer for a uniformed second-string parent.

If you hit your spouse in front of your children, your children will hit their spouse in front of their children.

Police work is...writing reports.

If you rob a gas station you're only going to get $20, but I get to see a K-9 dog use your arm as a chew toy. For all I care you can keep the $20.

In 1 week of patrol work in a large city only about 10 minutes would be cool enough to be on the television show, COPS. But if COPS was about report writing and accident reports each show would be a week long.

Every traffic stop could end in gunfire, but we have to be polite and professional until that time.

I've taken about the same amount of men/women to jail for domestic violence, so NO it's not always the man.

People love firefighters.

Attention Victims: I need to know the WHO, WHAT, WHERE, WHEN, and HOW. Not what meds you're on or what your 15 cats have peed on.

Some cops don't like to be called cops. I don't know why, but most don't care -- we've been called worse.

If you find crack pipes in the lady's purse, there is a good chance they belong to her.

Cops know you pay taxes and that your taxes pay cops' salaries. Cops also pay taxes, which also pay cops' salaries so, hey, this traffic stop is on me. Now sign here; press hard.

And a Variation On The Above --- Irate Offender: My tax money pays your salary, so you work for me! LEO: I pay taxes, too, so I figure I'm self-employed.

When you see an officer walk into the room, a polite greeting of Hello, how are you? is much more appropriate than, Uh-Oh Jim, it looks like they're here for you! or putting your arms up and exclaiming, I didn't do it! It will surely save you from looking like an unoriginal horse's ass.

If there are police cars, fire trucks, or ambulances at your neighbor's house then there is a problem. You don't need to meddle into your neighbor's business by asking us what's happening. Your curiosity, no matter how strong, is not a reason violate your neighbor's privacy. If it's something that YOU need to worry about, we would've knocked on your door and told you.

Remember that you and I enjoy the benefits of Constitutional rights. So does the guy you suspect of stealing your stuff. No, I can't go search his house for your property just because you suspect he might be involved.

No, I don't know your cousin who's a police officer in (fill in location anywhere in the US) (We Don't All Know Each Other)

No your crappy band doesn't have until 10:00pm to blast your crappy music out of that garage.

If I can see a 12 year old in your house finishing a beer bong I don't need a warrant.

If you don't know what the speed limit in your neighborhood is what makes you think it's 65.

If a neighborhood association asks for police to start ticketing in their neighborhood, one of the first five ticketed is on the board of the association.

When you're blocking an area to traffic (both foot and vehicle), "No, you can't go that way" doesn't mean, "You're special, so by all means, go ahead."

If an officer is standing in front of you with his hand outstretched, waving furiously at you, plus he's yelling for you to "Stop", it's usually a good idea to do as he asks. Please don't keep driving towards the officer.

Flares + cruiser parked at an angle equals a place you can't go, even if it's a ramp to the interstate.

Don't run from the police and then attempt to hide in a warehouse. Especially don't do this if the officers tell you that the dog is going to be let
loose, as this will generally result in the dog winning. They leave some pretty marks, by the way.

Stop resisting means exactly that. Don't say "I'm not resisting" as you throw a punch at the officer's face.

Just because you're handcuffed doesn't mean you won't go on the ground if you attempt to assault an officer. We don't even make exceptions for pregnant women who bite us, either.

Did you really think I wasn't going to find that large lump of crack you got clenched in your butt? Come on, it's either the world's largest 'roid, or you
got something you ain't supposed to have.

If they tell you they borrowed the jacket from a friend, just before you search it, they've got something, and it's still gonna be their jacket.

For some reason, you think I'll believe it when you tell me that you don't know how it got there. (see above)

Stopping a green man in a blue shirt and pink pants a block away from an armed robbery when the suspect description is a green man in a blue shirt and pink pants...IS NOT racial profiling.

Just because you have your hazard lights on, doesn't mean it is okay to park in the fire lane and run into the store. Even if you really need milk!

No I will not go get your 6 year old from their friend's house, because it is 1:00am and you don't want to drive 3 minutes. Maybe you should set a curfew, and enforce it. I am not a bad police officer, you are a bad parent.

Don't call us and ask us to solve a problem in 10 minutes that took 2 years to create.

And Last but not least: 99% of Police Officers do their job honestly and with great pride, we try to do our job well. Often we have to work in environments where we are the only ones that have to follow the rules.

A veteran Sergeant told me on my first day of patrol when you wear that uniform everything you do is a liability.

We do make mistakes and due to the nature of the job sometimes they have horrible results. Sometimes minor mistakes cost Police Officers their
lives, at a rate of 1 every 50 hours.


__________________
 
Arrrrrrgh!

Reading this reminded me of another one of my gripes about this rip-off state. Here you get cited for a mechanical violation you've automatically got a fine and some more points on your insurance rating to cost yoy even more for years to come. When I was in California, the system was designed solely to get the mechanical problems fixed, not empty your pockets. You got a citation for a defective brake light, you fixed the problem, then stopped by any police dept, CHP or sheriff's office (24/7), and they'd verify the fix and if it was within a week of the citation date, void it. Total cost to you: $2.98+tax for a new bulb and 5 minutes with a screw driver to put it in, plus another 20 minutes or so to stop in to have it checked.

Ken.
 
AAARGH!!!

Not only that, but MA prohibits magistrates and judges from imposing any form of alternate sentence which defeats the legislative intent of assuing that no one weasels out without a surcharge.
 
KMaurer said:
Arrrrrrgh!

Reading this reminded me of another one of my gripes about this rip-off state. Here you get cited for a mechanical violation you've automatically got a fine and some more points on your insurance rating to cost yoy even more for years to come. When I was in California, the system was designed solely to get the mechanical problems fixed, not empty your pockets. You got a citation for a defective brake light, you fixed the problem, then stopped by any police dept, CHP or sheriff's office (24/7), and they'd verify the fix and if it was within a week of the citation date, void it. Total cost to you: $2.98+tax for a new bulb and 5 minutes with a screw driver to put it in, plus another 20 minutes or so to stop in to have it checked.

Ken.
A written or verbal warning is still allowable under chp90s7 Equipment Violations. There is no automatic fine. And to the best of my knowledge, insurance surcharges are for moving violations only.
You'll find that most 90-7 violations end up in a warning unless the same car has been stopped numerous times for the same violation.
 
"A written or verbal warning is still allowable under chp90s7 Equipment Violations. There is no automatic fine." J.

I have been stopped several times over the years for legit mechanical problems (headlight or tail light out) and many times on attempted fishing expeditions (usually the old flickering license plate light that terminated immediately upon presentation of my MSP ID). The legitmate times were when I was a GI at Ft. Devens and included a stop by the Shirley Police (the sworn, sworn enemy of all GI's at Devens) but all I ever got was a warning. Truthfully, I have never heard of anyone getting a fine in MA, in my limited circle of acaquaintences and experiences.

Unfailing politeness has always been my standard of conduct no matter how arrogant the cop was. The only time they were arrogant, was when they "tried to go fishing" and after I I'D myself, their demeanor always changed.

I'd be interested to know the ratio of warnings to tickets for mechanical defects.

Regards,

Mark
 
Oh, I should've mentioned that IF the officer gets arrogant with me (after I've been polite), and he is in the wrong, I give him arrogance right back. Like the VT State Trooper that tried to convince me his radar works through other vehicles, then tried to BS me into accepting a ticket. Of course, the fact that a van had just passed me like I was sitting still, might've had some to do with it. His trying to BS me was a clear indicator that he never clocked me on radar, as he claimed he had. It's rare I do that.

I've called in several complaints on Troopers from the same barracks (Williston) for reckless driving (in the winter) while on their way to work in the morning. Of course, I don't call their boss, I call the Supervisor in their Garage that's about a mile from where I work, and make sure he knows what I saw, to include plate # and time.
 
Speaking of Mechanical Violations

Yeah i got pulled over the other day in Middleboro, for my "third" brake light being out....When i asked him what that was he said it was the brake light over the back window of my pick-up. When I informed him it was an accessory light to see in the bed of my truck not a brake light, he literally said "oh what do ya know" and asked again for my license and registration....I wonder what he was really looking for?
 
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Cops know you pay taxes and that your taxes pay cops' salaries. Cops also pay taxes, which also pay cops' salaries so, hey, this traffic stop is on me. Now sign here; press hard.

And a Variation On The Above --- Irate Offender: My tax money pays your salary, so you work for me! LEO: I pay taxes, too, so I figure I'm self-employed.

__________________


Sorry but paying taxes with tax money doesn't count. I think public employees should be exempt from paying taxes and instead have their salaries reduced to the after tax amount. Every April they would be reminded that they do not produce wealth or create tax revenue.
 
"I have been stopped several times over the years for legit mechanical problems (headlight or tail light out) and many times on attempted fishing expeditions (usually the old flickering license plate light that terminated immediately upon presentation of my MSP ID)...... The only time they were arrogant, was when they "tried to go fishing" and after I I'D myself, their demeanor always changed.

The problem is with those of us that don't have a MSP ID or other "get out of jail free" cards. Having been on the receiving end of a couple of these "fishing expeditions", I can tell you it completely sucks. Always an instance of your word against their word, and you both know they are lying. a**h***s like that should be fired immediately and barred from ever holding a position of authority again.

BTW, nothing ever came out of any of these. Ended with a "Have a nice day" by the cop. I was always polite to a fault. Bottom line; my rights were violated by an a**h*** in power because he can. Really, really, really, really pisses me off.
 
"A written or verbal warning is still allowable under chp90s7 Equipment Violations. There is no automatic fine." J.

I have been stopped several times over the years for legit mechanical problems (headlight or tail light out) and many times on attempted fishing expeditions (usually the old flickering license plate light that terminated immediately upon presentation of my MSP ID). The legitmate times were when I was a GI at Ft. Devens and included a stop by the Shirley Police (the sworn, sworn enemy of all GI's at Devens) but all I ever got was a warning. Truthfully, I have never heard of anyone getting a fine in MA, in my limited circle of acaquaintences and experiences.

Unfailing politeness has always been my standard of conduct no matter how arrogant the cop was. The only time they were arrogant, was when they "tried to go fishing" and after I I'D myself, their demeanor always changed.

I'd be interested to know the ratio of warnings to tickets for mechanical defects.

Regards,

Mark

Too bad we all can't get MSP ID's to change the demeanor of cops.

I rarely talk to cops (except on a friendly basis), but my experiences have been generally pretty good.

My wife just interrupted me and I forgot what I was going to type. I'll bet it was really witty, and everyone would have hi-fived me for my brilliance.
 
Register dude :"Hold the spit! It's for a cop"

Cook: "Holding the spit!"


Farva: I don't want a large Farva. I want a go**mn litre o' cola.
Dimpus Burger Guy: I don't know what that is.
Farva: Litre is French for give me some f**king cola before I break vous f**ing lips!
 
Speaking of Mechanical Violations

Yeah i got pulled over the other day in Middleboro, for my "third" brake light being out....When i asked him what that was he said it was the brake light over the back window of my pick-up. When I informed him it was an accessory light to see in the bed of my truck not a brake light, he literally said "oh what do ya know" and asked again for my license and registration....I wonder what he was really looking for?

That's when you say to them... "Sir, is that a Zebco I see inside your cruiser there? What kinda lure is on it? " j/k.

-Mike
 
Mike, the issued equipment is a Popeil Pocket Fisherman. Much more easier to conceal and I can use for real fishing while working too[wink]
pocket-fisherman.jpg
 
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It is possible to get a ticket and insurance points added for a mechanical issue. had a light out twice when I was 17, both times got a ticket and a 2 point insurance hike :/ couple that with one speeding ticket and I almost lost my license.
 
Nickle said:
C-pher said:
I've always found that politeness works far better with LEO's than arrogance.
You know what they say, You'll catch more flies with honey.

Or, these days, you'll catch more flies with _money_!

I know this was from like three years ago, but was that Darius suggesting bribing cops? [shocked][laugh]
 
If your kid won't do his homework or do his chores,911 is not the answer for a uniformed second-string parent.
I actually heard a radio call in Marlborough the other day where some woman had called 911 because her son wouldn't go to school. Dispatcher prefaced the call with "If you don't have anything else to do...". What idiot calls 911 because she can't handle her son? Turn the little f***er over your lap and give him 30 whacks.

Oh, right... Sorry, for a minute I thought I lived in a free state.
Arrrrrrgh!

Reading this reminded me of another one of my gripes about this rip-off state. Here you get cited for a mechanical violation you've automatically got a fine and some more points on your insurance rating to cost yoy even more for years to come. When I was in California, the system was designed solely to get the mechanical problems fixed, not empty your pockets. You got a citation for a defective brake light, you fixed the problem, then stopped by any police dept, CHP or sheriff's office (24/7), and they'd verify the fix and if it was within a week of the citation date, void it. Total cost to you: $2.98+tax for a new bulb and 5 minutes with a screw driver to put it in, plus another 20 minutes or so to stop in to have it checked.
Got stopped a few months back for an expired sticker. Cop told me to go get it inspected.

'Course, I suspect the fact that when he asked me if I knew why he pulled me over I answered with "I haven't the vaguest idea, Officer - I'm pretty sure I wasn't speeding" might have had something to do with it. Either that, or the truly thunderstruck look on my face when he told me my sticker was expired. I keep my car in good shape; I have no reason NOT to get it inspected.

Anyway, verbal warning. Which I greatly appreciated, especially after he told me that the ticket would add points to my licence!
 
VT is pretty good about mechanical issues.

They write you a "fix it ticket", which amounts to a written warning. You get the item fixed, then take it to an Inspection Station (garage licensed to do state inspections, not state run), and they sign off on it, and you send it in, or drop it off with the issuing PD (wouldn't know for sure, they've always told me to get it fixed and forget it, no paper involved).
 
A written or verbal warning is still allowable under chp90s7 Equipment Violations. There is no automatic fine.

I got such a written warning from a Statie for a burned out headlight. No fine. No need to do anything other than fix it.
 
"A

I have been stopped several times over the years for legit mechanical problems (headlight or tail light out) and many times on attempted fishing expeditions (usually the old flickering license plate light that terminated immediately upon presentation of my MSP ID).


All animals are equal, Some are just more equal.

I am generally pro-leo. And while I have no doubt that professional courtesy is a wonderful thing and all. What do us, little people, do when this same cop starts the fishing expedition with us?

How many violations to tack onto the flickering license plate light does he find on other people?

We don't have the magic kryptonite card that tells officer fisherman we are ok, to leave us alone and stop harrassing us.
 
I actually heard a radio call in Marlborough the other day where some woman had called 911 because her son wouldn't go to school. Dispatcher prefaced the call with "If you don't have anything else to do...". What idiot calls 911 because she can't handle her son? Turn the little f***er over your lap and give him 30 whacks.

Problem is, in most of these socialist nanny-states, the kid would then call 911 and you'd be in jail.
 
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